A Heart's Eternal Flame
by Fictionheart17
Summary: This is a story of Alice,when she's human. she's abducted and raped for the past 4 years and finally escapes. she goes back to forks hoping for a normal life waiting. but her family died and left her without a home.
1. Chapter 1

Ch.1

My heart pounded against my chest as I ran through the dark,rainy forest. The rain pelted against my face leaving my sight blurry and unclear. I wasn't able to see what was in front of me because of the darkness.

I finally stopped,out of breath near a tree. I couldn't hear him behind me anymore. Though I was cold,and of course wet. That's perfect. Shit. Just what I need. I didn't need to catch pneumonia now of all times.

I had finally had gotten away from him. After 4 years of torture. But I wasn't sure if I had a home now,they haven't seen me for so long now. I wouldn't be surprised. I was in 5th grade when I was taken. Now I'm supposed to be a freshman in high school.

My heart ached at the thought of my parents and friends not excepting me. But I wouldn't blame them if they didn't. I went through living hell though. What was I supposed to do now. Actually I wouldn't call it living hell. More like purgatory. Which is pure _torment. _I felt as though I was dead,but I'm still living. It's a horrible feeling to have. I wish I had died instead of went through the torment for the 4 years.

I looked around the darkness and saw nothing but dark outlines of trees and nothing else. I listened to the silence around me. Hoping that I didn't hear his voice coming from the distance. I prayed everyday he had me down in that room. I prayed to the lord that I wanted him to take my soul and keep it. But I guess that the lord had something for me to still do if he kept me alive.

I had attempted suicide many times,but that horrid,retched man kept me alive and tortured me until I begged him to stop and just kill me. But no luck. He just kept me screaming and begging for death until I screamed myself asleep every night for the past 4 years.

The forest remained as silent as it had been when I was running through it. I don't think,I hoped that he would never find me. Ever... I don't think he even got up from the crow bar hitting him in the face. Actually I hit him more than just once. I hit him until my arms couldn't lift it anymore.

He was lucky. He probably died. Lucky....but I don't think the lord took his soul. He went straight to hell for what he did to to me and the women before me. He had 6 other victims before me. They all died from the torture,one named Bethany held her breath until she suffocated. She didn't have it as worse as me though. She had only been there 1 or 2 months the most. She just couldn't take it.

I didn't ever meet the other victims,only Bethany. I came the day she had killed herself. I was scared at first,because I didn't know what was going on. I was only 12 years old when he kidnapped me. That was the last time I saw my family.

I was out shopping with my mom and dad,we where in Seattle when it happened. I was coming out of the bathroom at the mall when he grabbed me. My family never knew. I wonder if my mom had anymore kids? I have an older brother. He was 14 the last time I saw him. Now he's eighteen.

I never learned my captures name. But he sexually abused me,every night he had me in that damn room. It was always dark and smelled like a garbage bump. I haven't seen the sun in so long. But then again...I haven't seen anything of the outside world for a long time. I don't even know what I look like now that I'm sixteen.

He always had told me that I was his favorite to look at. That I'd always be his and no one elses. And if I ever ran away he'd kill me. I don't think he'll ever find me now,ever. I still remembered my name and age,along with the name of my parents and other important things.

There wasn't a day that pasted by that memories of friends and family floated randomly into my mind. Those are the only things that kept me striving to live the past years. I just hoped it paid off and I didn't do it all for nothing. I just hoped that I still had something left to go back to.

My name is Mary Alice Brandon. Though everyone called me Alice. I live in the town of Forks,Washington with my parents and brother. Born December 21st,1992.

I was still exhausted from running for so long. I fell onto my knees onto the muddy ground. I don't know where I am. So I guess I'm on my own until I can get back home. Seattle was the last place I had seen. He could have taken me anywhere in the country and I wouldn't know it. Oh well. I'm not giving up after I've come this far.

I'm going to do whatever I can to get back home and I'm never going to give up. Mistakes and hardships will come,that's just the way life is and I can take it.

_Hey it's Fictionheart17 here!! ^_^_

_I hope u all enjoyed the first chapter of "A Heart's Eternal Flame". I really enjoyed writing the first chapter. I know that this is sort of a completely different spin off of "Twilight". But I hope u all enjoy this story and please give me feedback on it. Any comment is greatly appreciation. Thanx. _

_-Fictionheart17 _


	2. Chapter 2

Ch. 2

My eyes fluttered open and I saw the forest. Lush and green. And with morning here the birds songs rang throughout the woods. Some sounding distant. Others seem very close.

I got up off the ground and stretched. My first day of freedom....Now all I have to do is find my family then my life will be back to normal. Hopefully of course. The sunlight warmed my pale,cold skin. I've been hidden from the sun for 4 years and I was so glad to feel it's warmth against my skin again.

I walked over the small stream and continued in the same direction I was running in last night before I fell asleep. I didn't know if it was north or south,west or east. I just knew that the sound of cars driving by was coming from this direction.

I kept walking for the next couple of minutes,then I found the road. More like a highway though. Cars were driving quickly in both directions.

"Shit. Which way is which?"I asked myself. I was still hidden by the thick trees and was peeking through a little space between the leaves. Then I saw a road sign.

"_Welcome To Forks." _Oh my god. I was right outside town all this time and I didn't know it. Tears welled up into my eyes and streamed down my cheeks. I sat back against the tree behind me and sobbed for who knows how long.

I just cried and cried. Pouring out all my frustration and anger that has been building up for the past 4 years. Each tear I shed relieved me of all of it. Anger,fear,and frustration. When I was done crying I was still breathing in ragged,harsh breaths. I took deep breaths to contain myself until I got home. I was calm now,so I could focus and not be bothered until the proper time came for that.

I read the sign again and saw that it was pointing forward. I had to walk only 2 miles till I get home. I got up and wiped the last tear on my cheek. And started walking for Forks.

I don't know how long I was walking but...I finally got there. The town was still small and quaint. And like before,the sky covered in a thick blanket of clouds. I wonder....are they for snow?....or rain?

I didn't even know what day it was either. I sorta lost track after a while. Now I wish that I remembered what day it was. That would help at least.

"Okay I gotta find the police station now. If I can remember where it is."I said to myself. I looked up and down the road,no one was out. I guess bad weather was coming soon. "I might want to hurry then."I said.

I walked quickly down the left side of the road until I saw the police station sign near the edge of the road. I stopped to read the very familiar sign. My dad was a police officer. Then it came to me! What if my dad was here today working? Then I could just go home.

I was at the door of the police station then and I entered,but I had a moment's hesitation before I entered. A calming heat came over me when I entered and then I suddenly realized that it was really cold outside. I shivered once and quick but the feeling was gone in an instant.

I looked around the small place. No one was here. Wasn't there at least supposed to be a person at the front desk to help people just encase? Geez....more waiting.

The police station was small,yet comfortable. Like the rest of Forks. The waiting room was plain white that matched the floor. There were about 5 or 6 chairs,of course they were some random color. The room sorta reminded me of the waiting room at the small hospital we have here.

Well the way I remember it,it was small.

I sat down in one of the chairs and sat back. I spotted a clock on the wall and it read ll:30a.m. And since I don't know when the police will be back..I'm maybe in for a long wait. I laid my head against the wall and closed me eyes. My eyes stung with dryness and it disappeared after a while. After a while a drifted off to sleep......

After who knows how long I heard voices coming from outside and the door opening. Then I thought it was a good idea when I stole some clothes from my kidnapper's dresser that he kept in the place were he kept me. The pants were a little big. Just plain blue jeans. I had to role them up some. And I took a plain white t-shirt. And over the years he bought me underwear and bra's. But no clothes. So it was very comfortable to be back into clothes. Even though they're his. I'd dispose of them as soon as possible.

Foot steps stopped abruptly when the people came into the waiting area. I didn't bother opening my eyes just yet. I was still really sleepy but my neck was getting stiff from leaning back. I took a deep breath. I opened my eyes and lifted up my head. I looked over at the people who came in they were exactly who I wanted to see.

The Police finally! They were giving me a suspicious look,I guess it is kind of weird if you find a strange girl that you don't know who the hell she is you start wondering. I smiled a happy free smile. They did the same time.

A man with a mustache and dark hair gave me a look from head to toe. "Can we help you?"he asked in a deep rocky voice.

I got up off the chair and looked at him in the eye. "...you don't remember me do you?"I asked,my voice sounded a little disappointed. Because I certainly remembered the chief. He came over numerous times over to our house for dinner. "It's me Alice...Mary Alice Brandon. Daughter of Joesph Brandon and his wife Emily Brandon. Sister of Jason Brandon. I was kidnapped four years ago while at a mall in Seattle."I said. I kept my face clear of any emotion.

Surprise and shock spread over both of the polices faces. He looked like he had just been punched in the stomach. Pain was at the brim of his eyes immediately.

He sighed heavily and slumped down into a chair. "Shit."was all he said.

"What?" I asked him.

"Where have you been these past four years?"He asked me. I was sort of surprised by the raw edge in his voice. He looked up at me. Hoping for a good excuse of why I was gone for so long.

"You son of a bitch!"I yelled. I just stared at him with disbelief. He thinks I ran away from home for the past four years. He didn't need to say it. I was all explained by the disappointed look he gave me.

"Don't talk that way to me young lady."he said in a stern fatherly like voice.

"Why shouldn't I? I can't even find words fitting for what your thinking. You think I would run away from home for four years and not even bother to call or anything?"I asked.

His eyes were guarded and he didn't dare let his stare falter. "Well I don't have a reason not to think that."he said. "You and your brother weren't always on the best of terms and so that leaves the possibility of this."he said.

"Well let me think...don't you think it's kinda normal for siblings to fight and bicker once and while? Hm?"I said rudely.

"That's also a possibility to."he said.

"Well consider this! I was kidnapped at that mall and I was rapped and abused for the past four fucking years!"I yelled. Tears streamed down my cheeks. Not from sadness. Just the fact that I was mad and I wasn't in a mood for this right now.

The other police officer was a woman. She was small and looked as though she could take down any man that got in her way. She gasped and looked at the chief. "What?"he said,as surprised at his co-worker.

"You heard me right."I said.

"So you didn't run away?"he asked.

"No. Why would I. Even if I got into fights with my brother I wouldn't run away for that reason. I 'd maybe just be mad and stop talking for a while but I sure as heck wouldn't run away from my parents at a mall."I told him.

"She has a good point chief."the woman said. The chief looked at her and nodded.

"Call Dr. Cullen. While I explain what happened."he said gravely.

She frowned solemnly at this and nodded. She walked off behind the desk and went through a door. I looked back at the chief,my eyes were full of wonder.

"You might want to sit down for this."he said.

I said down immediately,the news was not good. I knew it from the serious of tone of his voice.

"Well after you disappeared....your father searched everywhere for you in Seattle. After about a week your mother convinced him to come home and to wait for you to come back on your own. She and your brother when down to Seattle went down to pick your dad up and while they were driving back up here they got into a car accident. Your parents died on impact. We took your brother to the hospital but he died after 24 hours after we checked him into the hospital."he told me.

Shock closed my throat and tears frantically spilled out of my eyes and down my cheeks. I was speechless,and the pain from the sorrow filled me to the brim.

"And they did an autopsy on your parents as well. Along with your brother. Your mother was pregnant again."he said.

That pushed me over the edge. I started sobbing and screaming into my hands,to muffle the noise. I had no one at all. I'm all alone now. What was I going to do?

_Hey it's Fictionheart17 here!! I'm glad that I got the 2__nd__ chapter done so fast. I hope you enjoy this chapter. I worked on it for a while and I just hope it's a good one. Or I would have just wasted my time writing it. Thanx. ~Fictionhear17 :)_


	3. Chapter 3

Ch. 3

Tears streaked down my cheeks as I cried on and on. It was probably after an hour or so when I stopped. The chief and gotten up as soon as I started to cry. He and my dad never liked to see women cry. My mom had cried a lot when I was little and it always made my dad really uncomfortable.

"Debbie,when is Dr. Cullen supposed to be here?"asked the chief. So the woman's name was Debbie...

Tears continued to come out of my eyes. They felt raw with all the crying. "He said that he'd be awhile. He apologizes. He know the severity of this problem."Debbie said. She looked at me,the sorrow in her eyes was clearly visible. She wasn't even giving an effort to hide it from me. I just felt even worse while she continued to look at me behind the desk.

I looked at he in the eye and then dropped my gaze. I didn't want to play games right now. I always like to mess around with my brother by staring at him in the eye,then it just end in a fight. Then the fight would turn into just a fun thing and we'd just laugh about it later that same day.

But now that I've gone through this I don't think I'll ever be like that again. Not like it really mattered though. I'll probably just be shipped off to some orphanage in Seattle somewhere until I turn 18,then I can start with a clean slate in a different town. Kids go through it and they survive it. I think at least. But it's only two years off it. But I just hope I'll get lucky and get a good life with someone who love me.

But I'm scared of men now. After what that man did to me....I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to get married and be happy. I just know I might never have any kids. I am not good with kids at all.

I finally got the tears to stop,but my eyes of course they were swollen and red. But Debbie and the chief kindly didn't tell me so. I wiped the last of tears and the wet tears they left down my cheeks. I looked up at the clock. 1:00p.m. I sighed and took in a ragged,quivering breath. I was calm now after crying I always felt better. I sometimes cried by myself in my room when I had had a bad day or I was stress. Even when I was just plain angry I'd cry. I have never yelled in my life. So if I ever yell I will surprise myself greatly.

After another 15 minutes of waiting I got up to stretch my legs. My butt was even hurting from sitting down for so long. That sucks when that happens.

I stretched my arms along with my legs. "Hey Debbie...can I have some water? My throat is really dry."I said.

"Oh yeah sure. We should have thought of that earlier. You must be really dehydrated."she said.

"Well I was in the woods last night and got a big drink from a small stream that I just happened to walk by."I said. I must say though. I'm really surprising myself that I was taking this so smoothly. Usually people are all freaked out and shit. But I guess I'm tougher than I remembered. Or maybe I got that way after all the torture. Hell...it can happen can it. Or it's just I'm one of those few people who can take a very serious matter very well.

I chugged down the big cup of water that Debbie had handed me and refilled it from the tap in the bathroom. She smiled when I started on the second cup. Then the door opened.

"Finally Doc."said the chief. His voice had some hint of amusement in it.

"Sorry Alex. I was tied up at the hospital."said a smooth kind voice.

"And I see you brought Jasper."the chief said.

"Yes. He had nothing better to do and Esme insisted that he come with while she and other kids go out to dinner."said the doctor.

"Your wife's got I good head on her shoulders."said the chief.

"Yeah she does. Jasper and I hardly spend time together so it's a good time to start I guess."he said.

"How you been Jasper?"the chief asked the doctor's son. I heard a soft mumble,to inaudible for me to hear. But I think he said fine. I don't know my ears are stupid.

"Sir,I know it's rude to interrupt but I think we should attend to Alice now. She is after all back after 4 years of missing and I don't think she's in proper medical condition."Debbie said. Her voice strictly business. I looked at Debbie surprised. Either she cared or she didn't want me around any longer.

Either way she was right. I needed to get checked. My prime concerns were:1. I hoped I didn't have and STD and 2. I wanted to now if I was pregnant or still able to get pregnant. Mostly my concerns are all of number one,and the first half of number 2. I don't think I'll get with any man after what had happened to me.

The Chief sighed and nodded. "She is right Carlisle. Our main concern is for Alice's health."he said.

I still couldn't see the doctor and the other person I wasn't sure if he nodded or not,but his next sentence told me so. "Of course. Lets get it done then."he said.

I was still standing,but leaning against the wall now. Because I did not want to sit down anymore. I was to antsy and annoyed as it is. When the doctor came out of the cover of the wall I felt suddenly calm too. But the doctor made me shocked for a second. He was really....what's the word.....hot?...not more like a statue straight from Rome. His skin was granite white,his eyes were a golden almost honey color,and his hair is a blond.

Good thing I was good at keeping emotions in check. Or else I would have been dead a long time ago. His son followed after him into the small waiting room. Another wave of comfort washed over me. But strangely even if it was comforting,I didn't trust this emotion. I felt like some how it didn't belong to me,but someone else. I've never felt that strange feeling before. Who ever heard of a misplaced emotion? I certainly haven't.

But I let the feeling comfort me. I didn't want to feel scared when he checked my health. Though in the corner of my mind fear still hung.

The doctor walked over to me,stopping a few feet away and appraised my appearance. He didn't look disgusted or sorry for me. I could feel his son's stare on me. I didn't want to look up. I looked down at my shoes and held my stare away from them both. Even though that comforting feeling was still there I was still scared beyond my personal belief.

"Alice? Do you want to be examined first? Do want to talk to me in private?"Dr. Carlisle asked me in a calm soothing voice. I swallowed,fear kept my voice from coming out. I actually had some questions about my health that I needed to know. Like I never got my period. Even though I was sixteen. And other personal questions like that.

"Alice? Can you look at me in the eye please?"he asked coming closer. His hand came slowly on my shoulder so I wouldn't jump,but I flinched away and started shivering uncontrollably. Tears stated to stream out of my already puffy eyes.

"Alice? Are you alright?"he asked me,his voice full of real concern.

"Yes."I croaked. My throat was dry and ruff. Making my voice sound the same.

Dr. Carlisle turned around toward Debbie,the chief,and his son. "Could you give us a private place to do this? She is still scared."he said,his voice was low and serious. I saw his son Jasper merely nod and he walked out of the room. Debbie and the chief hesitated for a moment but the left the same way Jasper left. Dr. Carlisle to my hand gently in his and he pulled me to the bathroom.

When inside he closed the door until it was open nothing but a crack. "Do you want me to leave you be until later?"he asked.

"I want to get this over with and I want to know my health. Because it's not really worth waiting if it's something bad."I said. A tear fell of my face and onto the floor.

"Are you sure? We can take you to the hospital and have a female doctor do the rape kit."he said.

"Like it's going to make a difference. Either way you or someone else is going to find out that I was raped and that I may have severe scars down there. Who cares who does it. I just want it done and over with. I know that Debbie and the Chief are going to find out no matter what I do."I said. My voice had gotten raw as the more I spoke.

"Your right. They will find out. But if your embarrassed to have me do it we can have a female doctor do this instead,if it will make you more comfortable."he said in a reasonable voice.

I looked up at him. His expression was kind. I looked away from his eyes. "Do you think I would be embarrassed? He made me wear nothing but underwear and a bra around him all the time. I didn't have clothes on at all except those."I said. Dr. Carlisle's breath caught. "But I would like it better if you took me to the hospital. I've been stuck in here all day and I'm not really comfortable doing the rape kit in a bathroom. No matter the circumstances."I said.

He smiled his gentle smile and nodded. "Alright. That sounds reasonable."he said. He opened the bathroom door and walked out. He waited for me to follow,I did.

"Wait here."he said. I was near the front door of the police station now. I could hear whispers in the waiting room. I heard Debbie,the chief,and Dr. Carlisle. I heard nearly silent footsteps coming up from behind me. I turned slightly and saw that it was the doctor's son,Jasper. I smiled a small smile at him. He smiled back at me. The same kind,small. He was just as gorgeous as his dad. His hair was blond and sorta long,his eyes a golden-honey color and he had the same pale granite looking skin.

"Don't worry you're going to be okay."he said to me suddenly. I like the sound of his voice. It was soft yet sorta ruff at the same time.

"Thanks for the reassurance."I said. He nodded. He looked like he was about to say something else but his father came walking out that second.

"We can go to the hospital now."he said. Jasper opened the door for me then and waited for me to walk out. When I did his father followed. Jasper came after and left the door to swing close itself.

Carlisle put his hand in the small of my back and led me to the only other car in the parking lot. It was a black Mercedes. Fancy car for such a small town.

He opened one of the the back doors for me. "Thanks."I said. I got in and he closed the door after me. Jasper got in on the other side and was sitting next to me. I was close to the door,nearly half off the seat. He was just sitting there. He didn't make and effort to make me sit on the whole seat.

He knew that I was still scared,I wonder how he knew? Maybe I was still shaking? No I wasn't. He must have just known.

Dr. Carlisle got in the driver's seat and started the car. The engine came to life quietly and he slide out of the parking lot smoothly.

We just got onto the road when raindrops started falling out of the sky. They were slow and few at first but as we drove down the street it turned into a full downpour. "Good timing,right Alice?"asked Dr. Carlisle.

"Yeah. I guess."I said. I was looking out the window. I didn't even to watch the scenery. I was just starting blankly into space. I wasn't thinking about anything about really. Keeping my mind clear kept my fear from spiking over again.

I could tell Jasper didn't want me to start crying so he kept his gaze averted his gaze from me. I would have to thank him later for not trying to talk to me or anything. Well that is if we ever see each other after today.

We finally pulled into the parking lot of the hospital. It was a lot bigger than I remember. It was like 3 or 4 stories bigger than I remember. I appraised it from top to bottom about 3 times before I got out. I closed the car door. Dr. Carlisle and Jasper waited for me to start walking with them before they walked into the hospital.

I followed them through the door and into the hospital lobby. When we got in there if started to smell like bleach and a slight hint of blood. My nose is really weird okay.

Dr. Carlisle walked over to one of two elevators and pressed the button. Nurses from all around the lobby were looking at the doctor and his son with extreme interest. I rolled my eyes and sighed. I looked up and felt Jasper's gaze on me.

I looked at him in the eye. He wanted to ask me so many questions. But he and I both knew that it was the time nor place to ask them. He gave me a reassuring smile after a minute. I couldn't help but smile back. I didn't feel scared being so close to him. That's a little strange.

The elevator dinged that it was here and we all three entered it. The door closed behind us. "Alice can you please press the 4th floor button."asked Dr. Carlisle. I just merely nodded and pressed the button.

"You'll be fine Alice,don't worry."he said. I nodded again and kept my gaze to the floor. I was looking at my feet. Debbie had given me a pair of flip flops. They were plain black ones. But they were nice and comfortable.

I wanted to get out of here and go get cleaned up. I look like shit. Under the pants I was wearing my legs have dirt smeared on them. And I just felt dirty. Over the four years he had me,to get me clean he would dump tons of bucket of cold water on me until he couldn't see any dirt at all. But he didn't do that very often.

The elevator reached the floor quickly and it dinged again,and opened it's doors. We walked out and followed Dr. Carlisle down the hall to a room down the hall. I walked in and sat down on the examining table before he could tell me to do so.

"Alice,I have a question for you."he said.

I looked up at him,already knowing the question. "If your asking if I got sick during the past four years. Yes I did. Stomach Flu about 5 times. Numerous Colds. And I came down with a high fever. But as you can see I'm alright now. I haven't got sick for a while now."I explained.

He nodded and turned away from me. Jasper and him stepped out of the room for a minute,mumbling so fast and soft I couldn't hear what they were saying. I bet he was telling Jasper to stand out of the room until he was done. I sighed,the breath came out shaky and scared. I hated myself right now. Letting this happen to me like this. I should have stopped it.

I stopped those thoughts immediately. This wasn't my fault. I was starting to think like those other rape victims who think it's all their fault. I knew it wasn't at all my fault on any level. It was that bastard's fault that I was in this predicament. And another thing I know is that I didn't develop any sort of mental connection with him like other rape victims and others held captive.

I stayed as independent as I have always been. And nothing would ever change it.

Dr. Carlisle came in then,I looked up at him and smiled. "Are you ready Alice?"he asked. I merely nodded and laid back. And I was prepared to hold my screams in no matter what.

~AN~

_hi it's fictionheart17 here!!! :) I'm happy that I finally got it done I worked a long time on this chapter and I hope you all like it. I'm going to start on the next chapter now!!! bye!!!! -fictionheart17 _


	4. Chapter 4

Ch. 4

Over three hours have passed since the rape kit was done. I was still in pain. Even though I don't know why. I was asleep now though. I think they were discussing were I'm going to go for the next 2 years. I have no other family left. My mom's parents died when she was young,I didn't even now them. And she was an only child. My dad's just passed away the year before I was taken and his brother,and my only uncle was murdered because he was involved in gang activity and he had no family. So the orphanage was looking more and more of my future home for the next two years.

I had fallen asleep after Dr. Carlisle was done doing the kit. The last thing I saw was his son Jasper coming in and sitting down next to me,and tears were falling out of my eyes rapidly. But I didn't scream at all. But Jasper could tell how hard it was for me so he let me fall asleep peacefully without asking any questions.

I opened my eyes slightly and didn't see anyone in my line of gaze. My mind was suffering from a bad headache and I managed to repress all those horrid memories that come up randomly in my mind. I could hear mumbling outside the door of the room. One of them was Dr. Carlisle and the other I didn't know. I bet it was a social worker. I knew this would happen,there's nothing I can do now. I just have to deal with it and keep moving forward in alive.

I was lying on my side and was facing the wall. I didn't feel like moving at all. I just wanted to stay there and to stay still. I felt like if I move I might just break into pieces like a vase that gets dropped to the ground. I felt meek and totally stupid. I hate feeling meek,and when people feel like they should treat me like a baby when I look meek. My parents did that a lot. That's why I was so rebellious. Well the biggest reason why.

The voices in the hall stopped and the door opened. And in walked Dr. Carlisle. He looked at me and saw that I was awake. "Are you feeling a little bit less tired now?"he asked. The concern in his voice was so plain and he wasn't even trying to hide it. I couldn't care less if he tried.

"Are you ready to get up now?"he asked.

"Yeah. The longer I lay here the worse I feel."I told him. I got up and sat on the edge of the bed.

"So what's going to happen now? Were are they sending me off too?"I asked,getting right to the point.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Don't act like you don't know. I'm only 16. I'm not a legal adult yet. So I'm going into foster care wither I want to or not. I have nothing left here except memories."I told him.

He smiled sympathetically to me,he didn't say anything for a few moments after. He seemed as though he was thinking of someway to tell me without as much pain.

"You can just tell me the truth. I'm not going to start crying again. It's pointless to anyways."I told him.

"Well...you have two choices. You can be sent into foster care or you can go with the family who wants you now."he said.

"What? But no one knows I'm back yet,I don't even think that anybody remembers me."I said.

"Your right. But my wife Esme has been wanting to adopt another child,a girl at that. And if you like we can arrange for you to come into our custody until your 18. She thought of it quickly and just called. We straightened out with the chief. All we need now is your consent."he said smiling happily.

My eyes grew wide with shock. "What?"I asked,not fully grasping what he said for a second. "You're telling me that you want to adopt me?"I asked.

"Yes. If you want to be adopted by us."he said.

"But you don't even know me,at all."I said.

"Well we have wanted another girl for a while. We have 3 sons and 2 daughters back home. They're all around your age. Actually Jasper,Bella,and Edward are your age. Rosalie and Emmett are older. They're juniors and the other three are Sophomores."he explained.

"But....I don't want to do this if it's trouble for anyone. I've already been enough trouble already."I said.

"You won't be any trouble at all."he said,his voice sincere.

I thought for a moment. "Okay...I will agree. But if I cause any trouble for you,you tell me and I'm leaving immediately. You've been to kind to me already."I said.

Carlisle's smile widened and walked over to me. He hugged me quickly and walked out of the room.

_What have I gotten myself into?_I asked myself. Jasper came in then,he looked happy and calm at the same time.

I didn't say anything to him,I just turned my head away and looked at something else. The chief came in then too. He smiled at me and patted me on the head. Debbie followed him in and nodded good-bye to me and they both walked out without a word at all to Jasper.

Carlisle came in and was talking on a cell phone. "Yes Esme. Yes,she's coming. But the longer you keep me on the phone the longer you have to wait to see her."he said. I heard a laugh come from the phone and then a good-bye. Carlisle flipped his phone closed and laughed. "She's really excited about you coming."he said.

"It's been awhile since we had so much as someone over for company,let alone a new member in the family."Jasper said. I had to repress my shock at the sound of his voice. It was smooth and attractive at the same time. Bad combination for a hot guy.

I got rid of those feeling immediately and smiled a small smile. "Well Alice...I guess we should go now."Carlisle said.

I hopped off the bed and wobbled a bit. Jasper walked over to me and steadied me with a strong,yet gentle grip on my arm. I looked up at him with a thankful smile. I heard his breath catch in his throat. I wondered why that happened. He let me go and kept behind me just in case I fell backwards.

"Don't worry Alice,we'll get you fed and washed up,then the dizziness will go away."Carlisle said.

" Okay."I said. I followed Dr. Carlisle out of the room and down the hallway to the elevator.

When we reached the lobby again we turned and went out a back exit. And sitting in a little way away was Dr. Carlisle's car.

"Alice you can have shotgun."said Jasper behind me. I jumped,which made him chuckle a little.

"Thanks Jasper,but you can sit-"

"No. You should."he interrupted me. I could sense that I would just loose the argument so I sighed and got in the passenger seat of the Mercedes.

We started driving and pulled out of the hospital parking lot and started down the road. I watched the steetlights zoom past the window. The lights going by so quickly made me get a headache. So I just stared out at the darkness all around us. And soon after I fell asleep.

I didn't know how long I was out but someone was carrying me into a house by the time I woke up. I woke up startled and strong arms kept me from falling. I looked up to see who it was. Jasper was carrying me into the house with ease. He looked down at me and smiled at my confused expression.

"We didn't want to wake you. This was the quickest way,other than leaving you in the car of course."he said. He laughed again when kept blinking to clear my vision. I slumped my head back against his arm and gave up. He walked somewere and set me down. I tried to sit up but fell right back down.

"I can't move."I said.

"That's because you haven eaten in a while."Jasper told me. I looked up at the ceiling and closed my eyes. "Are you going back to sleep?"he asked from across the room.

"Yes. I'll eat when I'm ready. Where is everyone anyways?"I asked.

"They went out shopping. We don't really keep a well stocked house. You're the first guest we've had in a while so we want you to be comfortable. Sorry if me carrying you wasn't okay with you."he said suddenly.

I was surprised that he apologized. I didn't mind at all. I actually quite enjoyed it. I'm very short though. I'm 4 foot 10 inches. That's what Dr. Carlisle told me anyways. Because not only did he do the rape kit he did an entire physical to make sure I was in good health. And I only weighed 92 pounds. He said that I was a little under weight but I'll live either way.

But living with little food for 4 years makes you loose a lot of weight fast. I have never been a big eater anyways.

"Well you don't have to apologize for it. But thanks for being concerned."I said. I sat up and actually managed. Jasper walked over to me and handed me a cup and plate. The cup was filled with milk and there was a sandwich on it.

"How did you get that done so fast?"I asked him.

"The kitchen is right over there."he said,pointing to the next room.

I was surprised about how open the house was. Big glass pane window's covered almost every wall. They all reached from the floor to the ceiling. But the walls that were there were white. I saw the stairs were even white.

"It's so open. Not cramped up or anything."I said.

"Yeah well we like our privacy but we don't have to hide in our own home do we?"he asked.

"No I guess not."I said.

He sat down next to me and looked at the wall. "Oh. Before you ask we don't have a t.v."he said.

"That's fine. I don't really think there's anything on t.v that I'm really dying to see."I laughed.

He laughed with me. "No I guess there would be."he said.

He turned his head toward me and I kept my gaze on my lap. "Alice....if you don't mind me asking...but did he ever hurt you so badly you wanted to just die?"

My throat closed with fear. What would I tell him? That I attempted suicide many times...and failed. That every night he would rape me and hurt me so bad that I felt that way...and that every minute of the past 4 years when I was awake I wanted to be dead. What would I tell anybody who asked me that question?

I found my answer then and looked at him in the eyes. I would just have to tell my new family the truth. I opened my mouth a little to start but it was still caught in my throat. I relaxed and my throat didn't feel all tight anymore.

"I felt like that way every night. When he would come at dark he would rape me and the hell,along with the pain started all over. It never stopped. So I wanted to die every minute he held me captive in those woods. I even attempted to take my own life,enough to loose count. But I failed every time. I'm ashamed of myself to say it but maybe it would have been best if I was dead right now."I told him. I wasn't lying at all. Those are the real words running through my head all the time.

He gave me a pained look. Why....why did he give that look? He didn't even know me....we just met today and he's giving me a look like I just ripped his heart out. "You shouldn't think that anymore. You have people who care for you now and don't you forget it! Ever!"he said,angrily and frustrated.

He got up and stormed out of the room and up the stairs. I watched him go with a shock look over my face. _What the fuck?_ I thought.

Without knowing my eyes teared up and tears streamed down my cheeks. Tears fell on my hands. I looked down at them like I had never seen them before. Why am I crying? I just met Jasper and he just met me. Why am I crying about him yelling at me? He was so nice and then when I answered his question he got mad at my answer. I started coughing and sobs came up with them.

I kept myself quiet and just kept sobbing. Horrid memories streamed back to me and made me cry more. I felt the pain of when he raped me and when he hit me across the face. I crossed my arms on my lap and put my head down and cried more and more,until I cried myself to sleep,the last thing I saw was the sun setting. Ending my first day of freedom.

_~AN~_

_Hey it's ficitonheart17 here!! i'm so glad I got chapter 4 done!! I'm sorry if you don't like it really but I surely did enjoy writing it. ~Fictionheart17 :)  
_


	5. Chapter 5

Ch. 5

_His touch...he struck me across the cheek. My face stung and I held back my scream of pain as he treated me roughly to please him..._

My eyes shot awake when the dream came back to me. That was a memory of when he raped me last. Every time he did the terror in me was renewed as if he had just taken me....

I was shaking badly and sweat drenched me from head to toe. I looked around,I was alone and safe in my new home...with my family...._Family_ the word sounded so new to me....could they actually accept me as their adopted daughter? I don't know. Maybe they already have.

I shook my head out of my trance and tried to ease my worries. I was here and they said I could stay.

Once my mind was eased I felt chills go up my spine. I turned around to look at the stairs,and heard footsteps.

The lights in the living room flicked on and made my eyes squint to see. It was Jasper up at the top of the stairs.

"Alice are you okay?"he asked me,purely concerned. He was wearing a plain white t-shirt and black sweats and his hair was damp.

I took a shuddering breath before talking. "Yeah...um I just had a nightmare that's all. I just woke up from it." I turned back around and stared down at my hands even though they were resting on my legs they were still shaking and wet with sweat.

I heard Jasper come down the stairs and when I blinked he was in front of me taking my hands gingerly into his. I looked into his eyes,they were calm. "You don't have to lie to me. All of us are here to help you. We can't do that if you don't let us help you."he said,his voice just a small whisper.

A wave of calm wrapped around me and stopped my shaking. Why did always feel comfortable when Jasper was near me? That's one thing that made me wonder about things. I just met him and yet I feel so comfortable around him...it's just so strange.

I pulled my hands away from his,and since he wasn't holding them firmly they slid out easily. He let me though. He could have held onto my hands and I wouldn't have cared. "Do you want to talk about it?"he asked.

I stared into his gaze. Lost in the honey color of them. I quickly snapped out of it. "No,maybe in the morning."I said turning my gaze to something else in the room,and settled on the wall behind him. He sighed softly and got up off the floor.

"Okay. We'll talk about it in the morning. Do you want to take a shower or something? Your drenched in sweat."he said,still keeping his voice soft and soothing. He was making sure that I stayed calm and didn't start to panic. Like that was going to happen.

But I did need a shower. I started shivering again and felt cold all over. "Yeah. But I don't have an extra pair of clothes. To wear." I said,through chattering teeth.

A small smile played on his lips but he fought to keep it away. "You can borrow something of mine until you go shopping with Esme,Bella,and Rosalie."He said.

I nodded and huddled myself together trying to warm myself up. "I'll be right back. Once I get back with your clothes you can get into the shower. Okay?"he asked. I nodded. Not wanting to move from my position.

I heard Jasper softly move up the stairs and as his footsteps faded down the hall my emotion of uneasiness came back to me slowly. I didn't want to be alone in the house right now. I'm scared that he'll come back to hurt me....

The thought of him made fear ease it's way through me. I started to shiver again and but not because I was cold either. It was pure fear I felt inside me.

Jasper was back a minute later and the calm safe feeling came back to me and I relaxed. He handed me some gray sweat pants and a black t-shirt. "Thanks."I said.

"Your welcome. Come on,I'll show you the bathroom."he said. I nodded in response and got up to follow him.

He lead me all the way down the long hallway upstairs and stopped in front of a dark room. He reached past in the dark room and flipped the light on. I blinked to get used to the light and walked in. I turned back to Jasper. He just smiled and closed the door.

I heard his footsteps fading down the hallway. _He really doesn't want to hurt me....he's not like him,no one is going to hurt me when I'm here._ Those were the only thought going through my mind.

I'm thankful I didn't develop Stockholm syndrome. That's were the captured individual develops a bond with their capture. That would be horrible if I had that.

I got out of the shower 15 minutes later. This is the first time I felt this clean in so long. I walked down the stairs and saw Jasper was sitting on the couch. He turned his head slightly and watched me come down. Seeing his gaze on me like that....it feels so strange,like he'd protect me from everything that would try to hurt me.

I avoided his burning gaze as I came down the stairs and walked over to sit next to him. We sat in silence for what seemed like forever. But could only have been five minutes or so. "Are you hungry Alice?"He asked me,turning his eyes back to me.

I just stared forward,I didn't want to see his smoldering gaze. "Not really. What time is it?"I asked.

"It's 6:30 in the morning. The sun will be up soon."he said.

"What day is it? I never found out."I asked.

"It's August 1st. School is starting up in 18 days. I don't think Carlisle will make you go to school if you don't want to. Esme can always home school you. She did that for all of us until we reached the right age so we could go to high school."he said.

I haven't been to school since 6th grade. I don't even remember the faces of my class mates. _But I'll be okay as long as Jasper is there...._ I shook that thought from my head. Where did that come from?

It was such a strange,my mind had just wanted me to cling to Jasper...that's strange of me. I never felt the feeling to do that before. I took in a deep breath and exhaled.

"Alice you okay?"he asked. I looked up at him and smiled.

"Yeah. I'm fine. Just spaced out there for a second. Sorry."I said.

"It's fine. Just relax okay,you just got out of that place not to long ago so you need to take it easy."he said. He got up and went into the kitchen. I sighed and leaned my head back on the couch.

My head wasn't throbbing anymore,so that was a good thing. I closed my eyes and just sat in the calm silence surrounding me. Jasper came then,setting another sandwich on my lap. I looked down at it and picked it up.

After I finished my sandwich Jasper took my plate and said that I should get some more sleep. So he went back upstairs after giving me a blanket and pillow to sleep with.

"Thanks."I said while he was leaving to back upstairs. Without turning around he just nodded and disappeared upstairs. When silence returned I yawned involuntarily. I laid down on the couch and fell asleep before I even hit the pillow.

_Hey Fictionheart17 here!!! :)_

_O_o im so sorry that I haven't updated in.....i forgot how long. But this is chapter five and I hope you all like it!!!! I will start the next chapter as soon as I can promise!!!!!_


	6. Chapter 6

Ch. 6

My eyes flittered open,but this time the sun was up somewhat and the sky held the new morning light.

I sat up and stretched my arms. No one was out in the living room,but I heard some footsteps coming down the stairs.

"Alice,did you sleep well?"

I turned to see who it was. I didn't see any of the family except for Carlisle and Jasper. But this woman had caring honey colored eyes,and carmal colored hair that had slight curl and framed a beautiful face.

I didn't know her name,and I didn't know what to say.

She smiled a pure kind smile. And came and sat down next to me. "I'm sorry that we didn't meet earlier yesterday. But we don't really keep a well stocked house and we wanted to make sure your as comfortable as possible. I'm Esme."she said.

"Oh. Nice to meet you.....mom."I said. I saw surprise,and happiness lighten in her eyes. Her smile grew slightly wider when she heard me call her mom. I didn't feel strange calling her that. It felt sort of right to me. Like she was my mother all along.

"You don't have to call me mom if you don't feel comfortable doing so."she said,her voice pure with kindess. I couldn't help but smile. It was a natural smile that I didn't have to think about putting up to show I was okay. I felt okay and safe....like when I felt with Jasper. Maybe I can stay with them.

"No. It's fine,it feels right to call you mom. I don't know if that sounds weird or anything. But it just sort of feels like the right thing to do to me." I said.

"It doesn't sound strange at all dear. I completely understand. Thank you for telling me what's on your mind. It's very helpful."she said. I laughed and she laughed with me. Her laugh was a sound I never heard before. It was beatiful....does that sound weird? It's the only description of it.

"So Alice,you met Jasper and Carlisle right?"she asked.

"Yeah. I met them yesterday."I said.

"I hope Jasper was being kind to you."she said,with somewhat tone of concern in her voice.

"Actaully he talked to me a lot,he showed me to the bathroom so I could take a shower and gave me some food last night."I said.

She arched one perfect eyebrow when I said that. "Why? Is he normally mean?"I asked.

She smiled again,and shook her head. "It's not that. He's usually a distant individual. What he does normally every day when there is no school is just stay in his room reading or on the computer."she said.

"Really? He didn't seem like the type to be away from people. He was really nice to me." I said.

"I hope all of them are nice to you. You are apart of our family now and your here to stay."she said.

I couldn't help but smile. She actually sounded like my mother. My real mother was very protective of her kids. If anyone bother us she'd jump in and start a big deal over it until she got her way with the situation.

"Thank you,mom."I said. I felt my eyes water up,I had a home now. And I could stay. "Thank you for letting me into your home."

She smiled sympatheticly at my tears and wrapped her arms around me. Her skin had a pleasant coolness to it when she drew me into her hug. It was pleasant,and comforting to me. I memory flashed in my mind. It was of my real mom giving me the last hug before I was taken.

I wrapped my arms around Esme and started to sob into her shoulder. "Oh dear,what is the matter?"she asked me.

I took in a quivering breath against her and sighed. "Nothing just old memories,and my memories aren't pleasant. I can't remember anything really prior to when I got taken. It's just you hugging me makes me think of how much I missed having a mom around to hug me."I said.

"Oh."She said. She made small shushing noises to help sooth my sobs.

I sat there next to her,my head on her shoulder. "Are you feeling alright now?"Esme asked. I nodded in silence against her shoulder.

My body felt slightly sluggish,yet at the same time I felt the strong urge to run and work out all of my emotions until I was stable again. That was how I felt when I hit him over the head. The instinctive urge to run away from danger and all of the world.

I felt the urge to do that a lot before I was taken too. After I got in to arguments with my family or someone else,after it was over I'd just run until all my anger and frustration was gone. Have you ever felt that way? Just to run away from everyone and everything?

"Esme,do you think I could go for a run?"I asked without even thinking. I lifted my head and looked at her. She was looking at me too. She was smiling still,not knowing why I wanted too.

"Of course you can."she said.

I said thank you and left. Running as soon as I was out the door into the woods.

_AN~~ _

_Hey Fictionheart17 here!!! I'm sorry that the chapter is so short but I want to space it out to make it last longer. And on the plus side the shorter the chapters the more quickly I can put them up :) lol. _

_Well I hope you enjoy this chapter. It's already chapter 6,geez. Well I'm going to start the next chapter now,for more updates on stuff visit my profile for current workings and stuff!!! :D Alright Bye!!!_

_~Fictionheart17_


	7. Chapter 7

Ch. 7

I ran as fast as I could through the woods,not caring were I was going. Frustration slipped it's way out of me while I pushed myself to run faster and faster. After a few minutes of sprinting my fast pace became slower until I was just walking through the woods.

The silence of the woods gave me peace of mind. No unexpected person around any corners to come and see how I was. No watchful eyes to watch over me like some gaurdian. Just me and my thoughts here. And right now that's all I needed.

I found a rock near a wide river I sat down on it. Sunshine reflected off the water,making it sparkle beautifully. I watched the river,lost in watching the flow of the water as it rippled here and there,or flowed in some uneven pattern.

_I wonder..._I wonder what? I don't know. I'm curious. My behavior around Jasper...was so strange. I felt compelled to stay near him and bury myself into his arms,so he could protect me from everything. It was so strange to me. This feeling so foreign, what was it?

"Geez,sometimes it's a wonder I didn't just off myself when I killed you."I whispered to nothing. Of course no one answered back to that. I wish I could talk to someone who understand my situation. I'm definaltly not going to some shrink that will just keep asking 'how do you feel about that' and 'I can understand your situation'. Yeah right. No one will understand what I went through,what the wretch put me through.

"I hate you! Your gone and I can't be! I hate you! I hate you!"I sceamed. I don't want to live like this. But at the same time I knew I have to move on from this. I still had so much life ahead of me. Maybe I could actually make something of it....like what?

I sighed in frustration on put my head on my lap and wraped my hands around my head.

The only thing I could hear was the sound of water flowing,it carried through the calming silence,blocking out all others.

I sat up and got off the rock. And I started walking along the side of the river.

I just kept walking,following the river opposite of it's flow. Then I found a beautiful sight.

A large mountain came from the ground,surrounded by a light fog. The scent of the trees and water was strong,but not so potent that you gag on it. The river disappeared around a bend that was hidden by the mountain. Trees lined it,all covered in thick blankets of moss.

"So green here."I breathed. The beauty of it was mystifying. I went to the side of the river and took off my socks and shoes. I walked into the water.

The cold water took my feet and I cringed slightly at the sudden coldness biting at my feet. My feet was pressed into the soft mud underneath. I smiled when I saw a dear across the river.

I dou and her fawn padded up the river's other edge and stopped to stare at me. The fawn hid behind his mother and followed her to the water's edge to get a drink. I watched them,standing completely still in awe as I watched them.

A small pang hit me in the heart. Making me think of my mother. Yet no tears came. I smiled sadly and sat down of the edge of the bank. Not caring about getting my pants wet. I looked back up at were the dou and her fawn were,they were gone.

"Aw well. At least I got to see them."I said to myself. Then I felt a small drop of water hit my nose. I blinked a few times in surprise before I looked up. The sun was now covered up by thick gray clouds.

No thunder and lightning came,but the rain did.

The rain came down in a small shower at first then came down in a downpour. I just sat there,still next to the river's edge,and watching the sky. The rain had soaked me,so there was no point in trying to run away from it.

So I got up and walked back to the house,with my shoes and socks in hand.

When I got back to the house Esme looked like she was about to have a heart attack when she saw me sopping wet and sneezing. "Alice! Oh my god! I was worried sick. Honey go take a warm bath or shower and I'll go get you some dry clothes."she said as she shoed me upstairs.

I held back a laugh at her reaction. I went upstairs and took a shower.

I got our of the shower after who knows how long. Esme had come in so quietly that I didn't even hear her come in. She set down a pile of clean clothes for me and taken my wet ones. I sighed in annoyance as I saw she had given me some white blouse with a black skirt. What was I a secretary?

I put them on along with the undergarments she lent to me. To my surprise they fit me perfectly. I looked at me self in the mirrior. My wet hair hung down past my shoulders,yeah definaltly had to change my hair. The blouse was fitted and showed my small figure and the skirt well....gave me an uncomfortable breeze.

I just rolled my eyes at my reflection and walked out of the bathroom.

Esme smiled warmly at me when I came down the stairs in the clothes she had brought me. "Well I'm glad to see that I got the right size."she said,proud of herself.

"You bought clothes for me?"I asked in confusion.

She gave me an incredolous look. "You needed clothes dear. I didn't want you to walk around with those ones you had. I actually went to town while you were gone. And when I got back and you weren't here you scared me near to death."she said.

"How long was I gone?"

"A good two hours at least. Did you have a good time outside though?"she asked curiously.

"Yeah. I was by a river and walked along the side off it for a while. Then it started raining."I laughed.

She smiled warmly and walked over to me. She put her arms around me and pulled me into a hug.

I instinctivly hugged her back. "Do you want to help me with dinner?"she asked as she pulled away.

"Sure."

"Okay great lets go."she said,sounding suddenly hyper. I laughed and followed her into the kitchen.

-----------------

_Hey fictionheart17 here!!_

_Sorry if this chapter is boring,I'll try and make the next one more exciting. Alice will be going to school in the next one how about that?? I don't know you guys will have to give me something to go on. :)_

_I hope to here back from you guys!! Thanx bye!!!_

_FF17 ;)_


	8. Chapter 8

Ch. 8

I helped Esme with dinner,which I was not good at all what so ever. I didn't know what to do,or what to get out. But she was patient and wasn't getting angry.

"Alice are the noodles ready yet?"she asked me as she cut the lettuce for the salad. I looked into the pot. What did noodles look like when they were done? I didn't know. Geez,never cooked spaghetti before.

"Um...I don't know."I sighed with defeat. She just smiled and patted me on the back in reassurance.

"Don't worry honey you'll get the hang of it soon enough."she said warmly. She looked into the pot and smiled. "Yep they're ready."

I nodded and turned off the stove. This was actually the first time I ever cooked before,not really hard to belive though,with the way I all confused gives it away really fast. "Alice why don't you go explore the house a bit. I'll help Esme take care of the rest."

I jumped nearly out of my skin when I heard Carlisle's voice. Esme and I turned to see Carlisle standing in the door way watching us shuffle around the kitchen. I flushed slightly in embarrassment.

Esme me gave me a comforting hug. "Don't worry,your father isn't the greatest helping hand in the kitchen either. But he's right. Let him and I take care of this,you go explore."she said.

"But what if I go into a room I'm not supposed to go into?"I asked,sort of frantic.

"Don't worry Alice. Your family here now,as long as you don't go through their things your brother and sisters don't care if you go into their rooms."Carlisle promised. I smiled and left the kitchen.

I didn't want to explore. I was sorta longing to go back to that river again,near the mountain. I wanted to wade in the river again and just sit there in the calming silence that it gave me. I helped me think clearly with out any distractions.

"I'm going outside!"I called. I heard them yell okay and I left.

I was out of the door in a flash and instead of running I walked into the inviting green woods. When I reached the trees I heard another care pull up to the house. I stared over my shoulder. 5 people got out of the car.

One I instantly recongized as Jasper. I looked at the rest of them. I didn't know their names,but I take it they must be my new siblings.

The one who got out after Jasper looked very similar to him. She was beautiful. Her hair was blond and her skin was pale white like the others. I had to blink a couple of times when I saw her. She was breath taking really. To beautiful to discribe.

The other girl was just as beautiful as her. Her hair was brown instead of blond,but her skin was the same pale white. The other two were both boys. The last one out of the back was huge man. Geez,he looks more like a grizzly bear than a high schooler. The one that got out of the drivers seat was smaller than him and his hair was copper and unruly.

Wow,some pretty kids Carlisle and Esme had. Though they were both beautiful people too. So wasn't very surprising I guess.

"So is she here?"the blond one asked Jasper.

"She should be."he said.

"Can't wait to meet her."said the brunette girl.

They all agreed in unison. I felt a strange feeling in my heart as I heard their conversation carry on. Carlisle and Esme opened the door and came out to greet them.

"Where's Alice?" Jasper asked.

"She's out for a walk."Esme said.

"Is she okay?"asked the blond.

"Yes Rosalie. She's fine." Carlisle answered.

So her name was Rosalie. "Do you want us to go find her?" Rosalie asked.

"No,she was upset this morning she cried for a while and went out for a run earlier. She came back sopping wet. I think maybe she went to think by herself for a while."Esme said.

"Why she cry this morning?"Jasper asked. His voice sounded hoarse,why?

"Don't worry Jasper,she was just thinking of her family then. She can't help it."Esme said in a soothing voice.

Jasper calmed down,but an edge of worry still remained in him. I turned. Esme was right. I wanted to be alone with my thoughts right now. Just needed time to think. So I turned back to the way I walked yesterday and started running.

I didn't stop running this time when I got the river's edge. I even ran all the way where the mountain was. I stopped on a low branch of a tree and sat on it. My lungs were on fire,gasping for air,not to mention my heart thundered in my chest heavily.

"Oh gosh."I breathed in a exhausted breath.

Even more fog was around the mountain today,making it look secluded and eerie. But yet it compelled me to keep walking until I was satisfied and in control of my emotions.

But there was a yearning in my chest....a yearning for _him_....not _him him_,but Jasper. I wanted to be wrapped in his arms and be with him forever. Was I in love with him. I shook my head at the thought.

_No it's not possible. I just met him,but yet I felt like I was ment to be with him...no more like destined for him in a way._

"What am I thinking. Am I crazy?" I asked myself. Just met the guy and more importantly he was sotra my brother right now. Wasn't he?

Well they never said anything about adopted siblings not getting togther. I immediately shook that thought out of my head. Jasper and I were never getting together.

It's not possible.

Well....maybe not....

NO! Yes it is.

I don't know. I had to figure this damn thing out. So fricking confusing.

I just sighed and walked into the fog,not really caring where it took me in the least.

___

_[Switch POV's to Jasper]_

Confusion ate away at my inards. I wanted so badly to go after Alice to comfort her. I felt that same feeling only stronger when I left her crying alone out in the living room last night.

Why.....

Why do I feel this strong urge just to wrap my arms around her to protect her...from everything...I never felt this strange urge before. Was it love?

No...

Couldn't be....could it?

"Jasper!"Rosalie snapped.

I jumped and looked over at my sister. "What's up with you staring into space like that? You okay?"she asked,concern in her voice.

"Yeah,I'm fine. Just worried about Alice sorta."I answered.

"Carlisle why do I feel like this?"I asked.

He looked at me from the stove,his eyes curious. "Feel like what?"he asked.

"Like I need to be with Alice to protect her. It's so confusing,I've never felt this way before."I said.

Carlisle just stared at me for a few silence moments not sure what to say to me. "I think maybe Jasper that you have found your mate."he said turning toward the stove again.

Esme turned around immediately when she heard what Carlisle had said. "What?"she asked in shock. Esme's breath caught her throat.

"I said-"

"I know what you said dear." She looked at me. "Do you think I could be true?"she asked Carlisle

"Anything is possible Esme."Carlisle said,he sighed and turned away from the stove,yet still stirring whatever was in there.

"What do you mean?"I asked confused.

"Maybe we should discuss this if this feeling keeps happening."said Carlisle

I merely nodded in response and let subject drop immediately.

____

_AN~~_

_Hey Fictionheart17 here! :) did you like this chapter?? Did ya? Did ya? I hope so I sure luved writing it,I wrote all of this in one day wow. I hope Ch.9 will be long and get written that fast. Well I hope to get review from you guys!! ~FF17_


	9. Chapter 9

Ch. 9

It was dark now..yet I didn't care in the least.

The sound of crickets echoed in the darkness as I walked following the river still. The river was beautiful,shining from the reflection of the moonlight. It was a full moon tonight. And it was so beautiful,it was a light blue color,never seen it that color before.

My feet ached slightly from walking for so long...wonder what time it is. I left sometime around the afternoon,I think I did anyways.

The sun was gone before I even noticed it was. I was in deep thought then. But now my mind was at ease,I wasn't worried about anything right now.

"I should get back."I said reluctantly. I heard branches cracking behind me. I turned quickly around and saw a dark figure walking toward me. Anger overcame me as I watched. The image of _his_ face flashed through my mind and I took off.

I turn and ran,not wanting to wait to see who it was. The skirt I was wearing made it a little harder to run but I ignored it and continued as fast as I could.

Hearing the other person's footsteps rushing toward me sent me going faster. I couldn't get caught again...ever. I took a sharp turn into the woods and jumped easily over every high branch in my path from the trees.

I found a path and turned on it,hopefully running toward home,but to my dismay it took me back toward the river. Panic was eating away at me as I heard the person behind me getting closer. I guess I still have to run.

I started running the way the river flowed,knowing it would lead me back to the pathway so I could get home. But it didn't run fast enough. I hand grabbed mine and pulled me back.

I almost screamed,but a wave of calm washed over me...Jasper?

----

_[Jasper'sPOV]_

I reached out and grabbed Alice's hand. When she stopped instantly I felt her panic and fright.

"Jasper?"she asked without turning.

"Yeah,it's me Alice. Don't worry."I said trying to comfort her.

"Can you stop doing that?"she asked turning toward me.

I gave her a curious look. "Stop what?"

"Stop doing that emotion thing were you make me calm. I want to be able to trust my own emotions you know. I can't exactly do that when you just do that calming me down thing. I have to learn to trust myself again,because I lost trust in myself after what happened."she said,her words were not angry,they had now emotion in them at all.

"How do you know it's me doing that?"I asked,narrowing my eyes slightly.

"Because it only ever happens when your around. That's how I know."she said.

I released my hold on her emotions. Tears instantly welled up in her eyes and slid down her face. My throat tightened instantly,I felt her pain again. My instincts roared at me to comfort her and keep her from ever shedding another tear.

"That's why I do it."I said without thinking. "I don't want to see you hurting like this. I don't know what it is but it's like I'm more in tuned to you then any other person when I sense their emotions."I explained.

She just watched me,when she looked away she sniffed slightly and wiped the tears from her face with her other hand. I pulled her toward me and hugged her.

I heard her gasp when I hugged her. When her body pressed up against mine instant warmth washed over me. "Please stop crying."I pleaded.

I buried my face in her hair,inhaling her scent. She smelled slightly like roses. But her scent was so intoxicating...why was that? I wonder. She relaxed against me and leaned against me.

"Why..does this feel right...yet it's not right?"she asked.

The truth is I didn't know the answer to that question. Me being a vampire for so long I've forgotten how old I am,I've never been attracted to any other human like this. But I couldn't exactly tell Alice that I'm a vampire that's over what...300 years old?

I continued to hold Alice to me,not wanting to let her go. Should I tell her?

-----

_[Alice's POV]_

I felt so comfortable in his arms like this. I don't know what it was,I just felt compelled to stay here. Without thinking about it I wrapped my arms around him.

I felt him kiss me on the head,I blushed slightly,then even deeper when I realized that he could feel what I'm feeling. Sorta weird.

"Truthfully Alice...I don't know why this feels the way it does."he said honestly.

"I believe you."I said tightening my hold on him slightly.

He laughed and pulled away slightly. I looked up at him,he looked up at the moon and it reflected in his eyes. Then he turned back toward me and kissed me on the lips lightly. I gasped when he did so,not expecting it.

"What was that for?"I asked,suddenly breathless. I smiled up at him in disbelief. All my fear and panic had disappeared and was replaced my something...something new. I didn't know what it was at all.

But I suddenly wanted to kiss him again. That was weird man,I've never felt this way at all before.

He smiled down at me as he felt my emotions. He kissed me again.

But it was more this time,heat built up between us immediately. I kissed him back this time. Though I didn't know what I was doing. His tongue licked my bottom lip,causing me to gasp at this.

His tongue then entered my mouth and he kissed me more deeply. I felt his breath in my mouth and I kissed him back. _God,please let me doing this right! _I thought in my mind.

Jasper's lips moved against mine gently as he explored my mouth. When he pulled away after a few more minutes of so he and I both were breathing heavily.

"That...was..."I said,not able to find words to describe it.

"Yeah it was....great."he said breathless.

You know you'd think I'd repulsed by what we just did,but I wasn't. Not at all. I actually enjoyed it.

"I think we should go back home now."Jasper said. He was smiling,smiling so happily that it made my heart melt at the sight of it.

"Okay. But you owe me for scaring the crap out of me."I said as we walked toward home.

"Okay. I owe you. I'll find some way to pay you back for what I did."he said,with a mischevious sound in his voice.

I laughed and we walked toward home.

----

_AN~~~_

_Hey Fictionheart17 here!! :) did you guys like this chapter?? I luvvveddd writing it I can tell you that. I hope you guys enjoyed reading it. Hehe.. and remember that if you want updates on the updates and other stuff just look at my profile page for those. KK!! Til next time!!_

_~FF17 :)_


	10. Chapter 10

Ch.10

_[Alice's POV]_

As Jasper and I walked through the woods,I was listening to the sound of our feet going along the path.

Jasper took my hand in his and held it confidently. "Gotten awfully cocky you have."I said.

He laughed and stopped us. I looked up at him,he was smiling.

"Why wouldn't I have?"he asked. He pulled me towards him,putting his lips to mine. It was just a peck on the lips but still enough to get my blood boiling under my skin at the contact of our lips.

"Geez your kisses are intoxicating."I said without thinking. Jasper tried to bite back a laugh but it came out full force. He laughed loudly and pulled me closer to him,wrapping his arms around my waist. He nuzzled my neck and kissed the hollow of my throat.

"Really? They are?"he said,amused as he kissed my neck. My breathing became harsh and ruff as he continued to plant light kisses on my throat.

When he was satisfied he pulled away from me. Gosh. I was breathing like I just ran a marathon,a long one at that. "Are you done yet?" I laughed.

"Nope." he said. He kissed my lips lightly and then pulled away. "Now I'm done...I guess."

I laughed at him and we continued to walk,though he kept one arm around my waist. "What will they think when we get back home?"I asked.

Out of the corner of my eyes I saw his head turn towards me. "They won't be bothered at all. In actuality all of the rest of us are together. Rosalie and Emmett,along with Bella and Edward."he said.

I turned toward him. "You mean you were the only one who didn't have someone to be with like they do?"I asked. He merely nodded.

"And everybody in town knows it about them. And since we're adopted they're not really related."he said.

"So everyone in the town knows?"I asked. He nodded.

"Yep. And they don't have a problem with it,so we let it be."he said.

When I heard that I felt suddenly at ease. So no one would judge us for what we were. Not like I would really care. I don't think I would ever trust anyone ever again. But here I am with Jasper,my first boyfriend? I don't know,I'm going to have to talk to Esme about this stuff. To confusing.

But I was surprised at myself. Getting in a relationship right after I just escaped from _him_. You would expect me to need some intense therapy after what I got away from. But I don't need to I guess.

_[Jasper's POV]_

I wanted to badly to know what Alice was thinking. She was relaxed as we walked but I could sense the edge of unease in her. How I wish I had Edward's power right now. Even for only a moment,I wanted to hear her thoughts. To actually know what was wrong with her.

I stopped us again and she looked at me confused. "Are you alright?"I asked. She hesitated. "If things came to fast,then I'm willing to let it stop here. Because the last thing I won't to do is force you into something you don't want to have,especially after what you got away-"

My words were cut off by her. She stood on her tip-toes and pressed her lips to mine. She held my shoulders so she wouldn't fall forward. Tears streamed down her cheeks. I felt waves of happiness welled up in her.

Why was she happy and crying? Sometimes human can still amaze me. Even for how long I've been alive. And I've been alive for a very long time. So long I've lost count of how many years.

I wrapped my arms around Alice,holding her closer to me and pulling her off her tip-toes. I let her take the lead. She slid her tongue into my mouth. I gasped at her action,but moaned lightly.

She smiled and continued to kiss me feverishly. Her lips were sealed to mine,sealing in her intoxicating scent. The scent smelled so delectable that I couldn't describe it. I pulled away after a few moments. She whined in protest and kissed me again.

"Alice,if you don't stop we're going to get to carried away."I warned. She whined and pulled away from me. She was actually _pouting_. Really! Her lip was out like a crying baby that doesn't get what it wants. "What's with that look?"I asked.

"I don't want to stop yet."she whined. She pouted more. God...she's going to kill me with that look. I actually found a weakness now. Alice's pouting face.

I sighed. "Alice,come on your killing me here. Stop with the look."I pleaded.

A michevious look lit up in her eye. And she deepened the pout. "I don't want to."she said,making her voice sound whiney.

Before I could think she kissed me again.

My instincts roared alive,though not my vampire instincts. My human ones. The next thing I knew I had Alice pinned to a tree and was kissing her like there was no tomorrow.

I felt her emotions,satisfaction swelled in her. She wanted me to loose control like this,but at the same time I was kissing her I wasn't hurting her,maybe the one who took her pounded on her,like she was a punching back. My stomach churned at the thought of seeing Alice on the floor broken and wanting to die.

I cupped her cheek with my hand and slowed the kiss,making it deeper and more sincere. I broke away from her lips and trailed down her throat. Alice's breathing was harsh and rough. She moaned when I lightly licked her throat.

I pulled away then. She didn't pout this time and knew that it' was the right decision for me to pull away. When she got her breathing under control she took my hand and we walked back to the house.

In actuality we were only five minutes away from the house. Embarrassment flooded over me when something dawned on me.....did they hear everything we did? _Shit_,,,this is going to be so embarrassing.

Then we walked right into the house,were all hell was going to break loose on us...._Damn_.

_llllllllllllll_

_AN~_

_hey Fictionheart17 here!! :) did you guys like the chapter??? I hope you did. Please give me feed back on it....please!! I'm going to start chapter 11 now. :) bye!!! ~FF17 _


	11. Chapter 11

Ch. 11

I took a deep breath before Jasper opened the door,heat welcomed us from inside the house,making it the all more inviting to be in. The light in the living room was on,and fear washed over me. _What are they going to thing?_ Was the only thought going through my mind.

"Don't worry,we'll be fine."he whispered to me soothingly. I wanted to believe him,I really did,but there was something inside me just wanting to just think of the worst things immaginable when they found out what had developed between us in the woods after just a short amount of time.

While the other a larger part of me had excepted it fully and didn't care what anybody had to say about it.

_What should I think? Should I go with the excepting part of myself or the disagreeing one?_ I just didn't know. All these feelings were forgein to me,and even stranger more as they got stronger.

I nodded in acceptance of it,and took a step forward. The only light on that was visible was the kitchen light. And soft murmurs and soft laughs came from it. My fear lessened. But I was still iffy.

Jasper kissed me lightly on the cheek and pulled me forward with him as he started toward the kitchen.

We got in and all noise stopped. Bella,Rosalie,Esme,Emmett,Carlisle,and Edward were all sitting on chairs at the table. Their stares all shot to mine and Jasper's hands,which were still interwined. But I knew if I let go I would run screaming out of the house. He squeezed my hand reassuringly and nudged me forward one more step.

Esme smiled at the sight of us when we took the last step. "Kids,this is the newest member of our family,Alice."she said proudly.

Bella was the first one to come up to us. "Hi Alice. I'm Bella." she said offering a sweet smile. She reached out and hugged me. I hugged her back by instinct. Well one of them excepted me at least.

Rosalie...I think came up to me and gave me a dazzling smile that would kill any man's heart. "Hi Alice,I'm Rosalie. It's nice to meet you."she said hugging me.

"Nice to meet you too."I said.

"Ha! She speaks!" I jumped from the loud booming voice of the one named Emmett he got up from the table and wrapped his arms around me in a giant bear hug.

He crushed the air out of me and I grunted in pain from his strength. "Emmett! Your hurting her let her go!"yelled Rosalie. He set me down immediately and I started to cough and hack from the crushing hug.

Jasper pulled me away from the lot of them and gave me room to breath. "You okay?"he asked,concerned. I nodded and cough once more.

"I'm fine,I'm fine."I gasped. Emmett gave me a sorrowful look and mouthed sorry to me.

I waved it off and took a deep breath. Edward the last of them at the table came up to me and gave me a gentle hug.

"Welcome to the family Alice,it's wonderful to have you here."he said. He smiled and walked back to the table. _Hm..that was odd._ But they all seem to like me I guess.

"Alice,come join us for dinner. Then we can get you settled in your room."Esme said,nodding at the seat next to her,and across from Jasper.

Without saying a word I walked over and took the seat next to her. Jasper sat across from me and locked his gaze with mine. He smiled proudly at me before turning his attention to his food.

After dinner Esme and my foster sisters blind folded me and guided me upstairs. None of the guys wanted to come up,well Jasper wanted to come but Esme said he had to stay downstairs.

"Guys...why _am_ I blindfolded again?"I asked.

"_Because_. We want you to be surprised when you see your room,if you closed your eyes you'd probably try to peek."Bella laughed. I shrugged,I maybe would have.

They guided me up the stairs and down long passage ways and corners,I did not know where they were taking me. But it felt as though I was being guided through a maze.

Nervousness knotted in my stomach as they stopped me in front of a door and opened it.

"Okay,when I take off the blindfold _keep_ your eyes closed."Rosalie said. I nodded. "Promise?"she asked.

I sighed. "Cross my heart,hope to die,stick a needle in my eye."I smiled. All three of them chuckled at that.

"Okay,eyes closed three,two,one."Bella said. They removed the blindfold and I kept my eyes closed as promised. They flicked on a light and manuvered me into the room. "Okay you can open your eyes now."Bella chimed.

I opened my eyes and stifled back a gasp.

The room was beautiful. The entire back wall was made of glass,and had a balcony on the outside,and had white walls. I had a computer on next to the glass door,a dresser pushed up against the right wall,and my bed pushed up against the left. The room was big enough to have easy movement about. And I have a stereo on a bookshelf next to the door. Other than that the room was empty,but it was still gorgeous. The view was of a small stream running off into the untouched forest.

"It's empty we know. But we thought that you would like to shop for your own books,CDs,and everything else that you want. We don't really know what you like."Esme said.

A tear fell from my eye and I quickly swiped it away. "It's great thank you so much."I said. More tears fell from my eyes and a sob broke loose. All three of them hugged me and held me in a tight embrace. Rosalie held me against her and let me cry on her.

"Shh. It's okay Alice. Just breath and you'll be fine."she cooed at me. I tried to but I just sobbed more.

"Should we let you be?"Esme asked soothingly.

"I should try to get used to things shouldn't I?"I asked.

They left a few minutes later when I got a hold of myself,and I sat down on my bed and took it all in.

Later on,maybe an hour or so later I fell asleep with tears of happiness running down my cheeks.

_AN-_

_Hey there!! :( I'm sorry that it took me so long to write,and that it's so short but I will start writing faster,I've just been busy lately. And I'm also thinking of writing another fanfiction....just not sure of what to write about yet. If you guys want to write to me my email is on my profile page. _

_I hope I hear from you guys!! I'd greatly appreciate it!!_

_~Fictionheart17_


	12. Chapter 12

Ch. 12

I woke up early the next morning,around 6:30 or so. I don't know why but I just couldn't sleep any longer. I almost started to cry again when I woke up to my bedroom....my own bedroom....that meant so much to me,they don't even know how much it does.

After all this time I have a place were I can truly say that it's mine. It's great. I was online right now. I was just looking at random websites,not knowing at all what they were for or what they offered to sell. Then I got an IM.

A small beep from the computer made me jump. And it said 'IM from Jasper' at the bottom of the screen. I clicked on it.....

IM Screen _**(hehehe evil laugh from me.....not Alice)**_

Jasper:Hey Alice,y r u awake so early?

Alice:Idk. I just woke up and couldn't sleep anymore.....y r u awake this early?

Jasper: :) b/c i can b. Lol.

Alice: -_-.....haha.....real funny....so wats up?

Jasper: nothin much....really bored,woke up about an hour ago....y r we Iming?

Alice: b/c we can...:) lol

Jasper: lol. C u down for breakfast in 5??

Alice:.... sure i guess,even though im not really hungry...

Jasper: :( Alice you're eating breakfast. You need to gain some weight and so you can be healthy.

Alice: :( i'm sorry...you have a point,okay i'll eat breakfast.

Jasper: :D okay good.

I logged off the computer and got up. I hope I can navigate my way downstairs.

I got downstairs after going through twists and turns of the large house,and boy,it was like a maze. I had to turn around here and went a wrong turn there. But when i got downstiars the sun was about just peaking over the trees and dappled the kitchen with little twinkling lights.

Jasper was on the outside deck and was watching nothing, my heart swelled when I saw

him standing there. I didn't deserve him at all. I was so plain jane and he was so....so god like it's not even funny.

I walked over to the door and opened it.

_Jasper's POV_

As soon as Alice opened the door her scent drifted to me and my body came to life. I felt an aching need to hold her and kiss her until we both became so breathless that we'd die in each other's arms.

But I would never do that to her I want to keep her safe with all my heart,and...I think I'm feeling love for the first time. But I don't know what this feeling is. I don't know whatever love is but I've always wanted to find out.

Alice walked over next to me,though gave space between us that I desperatly wanted to close.

"You angry?"she asked twidling her thumbs. I closed the gap between us quickly and pressed her up against the railing and pressed my lips to hers without saying a word.

My senses roared alive when my mouth closed over hers,and her scent filled me so much that I felt drunk.

She opened her mouth in open invitation for me and I took it without a second thought. I

explored her mouth with my tounge until I made her breathless. When I tried to pull away she locked her arms around my neck and pressed her mouth back to mine.

She moaned when I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her closer. I broke away from her mouth and let my lips travel down her throat. I got to the base of her neck when a burning sensation coarsed through me.

_Blood Lust..._

I tore away from her quickly and had her pinned to the railing the next second. I was breathing raggedly and didn't know what was happening. The next thing I knew my fangs pierced her neck and her blood flowed into my mouth.

_AN-_

_Hey Fictionheart17 here!! :) i like dis chapter!! i luved writing it that's for sure....maybe a little too much.....lol. Well i'm going to start on chapter 13 now!!!_

_~Fictionheart17 :)_


	13. Chapter 13

Ch. 13

_Jasper POV_

My teeth sank into Alice's throat with a little pop of the skin and her blood flowed into my mouth.

The sweet intoxicating flavor hit my mouth and her scent filled all my senses. She didn't fight against me. But instead she had her arms braced against the railings,until she slumped against me.

I came back to my senses immediatley and pulled away from her throat. She was unconcious,but that wasn't the problem....

my venom was now inside her,running through her veins. And I don't know what to do about it. Then an idea came into mind. I could such a little more out to clean her blood of it.

So I did. I sank my teeth back into her throat and sucked until the venom was out. I didn't want to pull away then. I wanted to drink and drink until the blood was gone. It was so intoxicating that it drowned out all sense of humanity I had.

But some how I released the hold on her throat. I looked up to see her face.

Alice's face was deathly pale,she looked on the brink of death right now. But her breathing came low and quivery. I picker her up in my arms and ran into the house.

_[Alice's POV]_

My head was swimming with dizzying thoughts, I couldn't seem to grasp a hold of any of them...to concentrate on anything. I can't remember what happened,only that I felt a slight pain in my neck,then nothing....

I felt something soft pressed against my mouth.....like I was being kissed....Jasper?

I opened my eyes as wide as I could manage. Jasper was indeed kissing me,and was holding me like a delicate doll.

"Jasper?"I mumbled against his lips.

He pulled back abruptly and a smile of pure relief came upon his gorgeous face.

"Oh thank god! Your okay!"he said. He leaned down and planted gentle little kisses over my face. So gentle they felt as if they were given by butterflies.

"Jasper? What's wrong? Why are you acting like this?"I asked laughing at his odd behavior.

He silenced me by pressing his lips to mine. I instinctively opened my mouth in welcome for him.

He deepened the kiss suddenly. Kissing me frantically and entwined his tongue with mine. I moaned into his mouth and locked my arms around his neck. He lifted me up,so that we were in a sitting position.

I pulled away reluctantly. "What's wrong with you?"I asked. He seemed confused by question and bit his lip in hesitation.

"Don't you remember what happened a few hours ago?"he asked.

That stumped me dead. _A few hours? What was he talking about?_

"A few hours? No we've just been out her for about 10 minutes."I said shaking my head.

_[Jasper POV]_

She doesn't remember? How can she not remember that I had bitten her? I surely would remember something like that,someone biting into my neck and sucking my blood....like a vampire. Which I am.

But I decided to go along with it. I started to laugh. "Oh...my bad,I thought I was hours. The time I spend with you is so fun that it seems to pass by so fast that it seems to be literally flying by."I said.

She gave me a concerned look. "Are you alright? Did you hit your head or something?"she asked feeling my head for some abrasion or bump.

I laughed again and took her hand in mine and kissed her pale white knuckles. She needed some food to help her from the blood lose.

I got up and pulled her up with me. "Now lets get some breakfast."I offered with a smile.

_[Alice POV]_

"Okay."

I wanted to know what was wrong with him. All the sudden he was acting as if something went terrible wrong. But the problem is I don't remember at all. Did I blackout or something?

I felt really woozy all the sudden and then the whole world started to tip over. Jasper caught me in his arms and helped me stay upright. "You haven't been eating enough have you?"he asked sternly.

My face flushed red. Okay...guilty. I haven't eating that much....but hey I'm just not that hungry. "I just haven't been hungry."I said defensively.

"Leave the poor girl alone Jasper."Edward said coming into the kitchen.

I jumped at the sound of Edward's voice. "You scared me."I laughed.

A smile spread across his face. "Sorry,have a habit of doing that to some people. Now Jasper,Mom said that she,and the girls are kidnapping her for the day. So say good-byes now."Edward said nodding out toward the living room.

Emmett came in then,with a huge grin on his face. "You too were alone for quiet a while...were you getting more familiar with each other?"he asked crossing his arms over his chest.

My face flushed again. And I could literally feel it burning like it was on fire.

Jasper wrapped his arms around me and held me close. "Why do wanna know? Does it make you jealous?"Jasper said teasingly.

Emmett's smile widened. "Oh no my brother. I get plenty-"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence!"Rosalie shouted from the other room. Emmett stopped immediately and howled in laughter. Jasper and Edward joined him in on it.

I couldn't weasel out of Jasper's iron clad grip. He held me hard against him and then we walked toward a back exit to the kitchen. "Were are we going?"I whispered.

"You'll see."he said with a mischievous tone in his voice.

We walked down the hallway to my bedroom and I stopped at the door. He opened to the door and let me in first. I turned back to him in confusion. And then I saw the smile on his face.

My face flushed and when he walked over to me he pressed his lips to mine again.

Though it wasn't as gentle as before,the kiss was desperate and heated immediately.

I welcomed his tongue into my mouth and a moan escaped from me when he deepened the kiss all the sudden. My arms locked around his neck and brought him closer to me.

He back me up and we fell backwards on the bed. I gasped into his mouth when his hands began to roam over my body. He broke the kiss and his mouth began to travel down my throat. Then my senses came back to me.

"Jasper. We should stop before we get to carried away."I said quickly. I heard him groan in defeat and he pulled away,with a hurt look on his face. I caught his arm.

"Jasper...it's not that I don't want to...it's more like I'm not ready too okay?"I asked.

I hated to make him upset,and I could feel my eyes were on the edge of tears. But I didn't want to give into this....I want a stronger relationship before we...you know...do it.

A tear slid down my face and shock crossed his face. He took my face in his hands and kissed the tears away. "Please don't cry Alice...please."he pleaded. He brought me close to him and embraced me tightly.

My throat closed immediately to hold back sobs,and then the memories flooded back to me...._all the horrible memories. _All the memories of _him_ beating me,and raping me came to my mind and kept replaying,and replaying.

The sobs broke loose with a horrible bloodcurdling scream from me,tears flooded rapidly down my face and I started to shake badly. Jasper held me to him,he knew it was a panic attack.

"Shh...shh calm down. He's dead Alice,he can never hurt you again."he whispered in my ear. I sobbed against him. Then I got another memory..

It's of when Jasper and I were outside a bit ago....I froze. He had bitten me....and he's a vampire...

_Vampire...._

With the realization I fainted in his arms.

AN~

_Hey it's Fictionheart17 here!!! :) Di d you like the chapter?? Did ya???? I hope you did. I finally got it done!!! yay!!! well going to start the next chapter now....BYE!!!!_

_~Fictionheart17 _


	14. Chapter 14

Ch. 14

_I'm floating in nothingness...._

_No.....I'm asleep....aren't I? I just remember everything when I remembered that Jasper was a......Vampire. _

My eyes shot open and I jumped awake. I was in my room,and light still poured through the wall of windows. I immediately felt my neck and felt a mark that burned at my touch.

"Ow!"I hissed. It's true though,he had actually bitten me. And he's a...vampire.

I bolted out of bed, if he was a vampire then doesn't that mean that the rest of the family are vampires too?

I don't know but all I needed were answers,that's all.

I got down stairs in record time for myself,it usually took me a couple of minutes to navigate through the labarith of halls.

I heard soft murmurs ans whispers coming from the kitchen. I didn't hesitate to walk in,I'm not afraid. If they wanted me dead,they would have done it already.

The soft words stopped immediately when I walked into the kitchen.

Esme gave me a guilty look and avoided eye contact. The others,except Jasper and Carlisle smiled when they saw me and looked me straight in they eye.

"Can I get some answers?"I said. Rosalie bit her bottom lip in hesitation.

I sighed in frustration. "Fine,don't explain. I'm going for a walk. _Alone_."I said,walking out of the kitchen and out the front door.

When I got to the edge of the woods and the front yard I stopped. I listened to hear if anyone was following me. I heard nothing. I walked on and with every step I took my heart grew heavy.

I kicked a rock with my tennis shoe and sent it bouncing along the path ahead of me.

Not wanting to follow the same trail I usually did I turned on a narrower one,that looked like I hadn't been walked on in years.

I kept walking and walking,not stopping to turn around. I don't know for how long. But I _finally_ came to the river that calmed me so.

Though it's not the usual place I come to,it didn't have the same view of the mountain,and it was narrower...not as wide as the other spot. I sat down on the ground near the water's edge,and hugged me legs to my chest.

I sighed. Then everything came crashing down on me. I felt guilty that I just left without so much as a good-bye. I didn't even reassure them that I was even going to come back.

Should I go back? What if they tell me just to pack up and leave if I do?

I weighed my options heavily until my head started to hurt and the sun was now setting.

"Ugh! Why does the day escape so fast! I'm just now getting the chance to live my life....why does it have to go by so fast..."I said. Tears came to my eyes and a sob escaped.

I haven't even been able to actually do anything yet. 4 years of my life are gone,taken away from me by some idiot. And they were filled with pain,tears,and more pain.

I heard rustling in the trees a few feet away from me. I jumped up in alarm. _Please let it be Jasper..._

My prayer was indeed answered. Jasper walked out of the thick dense trees. "What are you doing here?"I asked. I turned and started down the river bank the opposite way of him.

"Alice! Wait! I want to explain somethings. And what do you mean why am I hear? You've been gone for hours."he snapped.

I turned back toward him,anger bubbled inside me. "Do not take that snappy tone with me! I'm the one who has a right to be angry."I snapped right back.

He scoffed. "Alice,what did you expect us to tell you? 'Oh,by the way we're vampires'? You would of thought we were crazy if we told you that."he said,dropping his snappy tone,and replaced it by hurt.

I frowned. "So what now? I have to leave or _die_?"I asked.

"No! Do you think we'd ever do anything to hurt you!?"he yelled.

"What other options do I have?"I asked crossing my arms over my chest.

He walked toward me until there was only a few inches between us. He wrapped his arms around me and brought me close.

My body accepted immediately and my breath caught in my throat at the contact. But I'm not afraid,I wanted to be with him always,I hated being away from him for to long.

"You'll always have other options open...except the die part. Your not allowed to die. I'd miss you to much."he said. I swallowed hard. _Don't cry,Don't cry_.

"You could always leave,you could stay with us as a human....or you could even be changed."he said.

I pulled back quickly. "What? You'd change me?"I asked shocked.

He smiled. "If that's what you wanted. But I was hoping that one day....you would change....and stay...with me."he said embarrassed. He looked away from me.

My heart fluttered in my chest at his words. Did he just say that he _loved_ me? "Jasper...did you.."I couldn't bring myself to ask the question,instead of saying anything I got up on my tip toes and pressed my lips to his.

He kissed me back out of instinct,but he deepened the kiss and it turned heated and passionate. I pulled away and my head was spinning. "I'm just saying that if you wanted it. But right now you need to enjoy being human for a while. But yes...I do....love you that is."he whispered into my ear.

I gasped in surprise...I love him too. I hugged him and he hugged me back gently,as if I would break. "I love you too Jasper. More than anything else. Even though it's been such a short time,your my world now."I whispered.

He pulled back abruptly and pressed his lips to mine hard and gave me a feverish kiss that made me loose all thoughts,and made me_ really _dizzy.

But for now I'm going to enjoy life as a human. For now......

_AN~~_

_hey fictionheart here!!! hows everybody doin?? :) stupid question I guess. _

_NEW MOON COMES OUT IN 3 MORE DAYS!! OMG!!!! I GET TO GO SEE IT!!! yay!!_

_~fh17_


	15. Chapter 15

Ch. 15

That night I couldn't sleep at all. My family explained everything and said they had to go out hunting. They'll be back the day after tomorrow. Jasper insisted that he stayed here to watch me. So he went out hunting somewhere in the woods. It was either that or he drank from me again,but he said he couldn't risk it.

They also explained that they'll have to do it every so often,so I should get used to being in the house.

I sighed and flipped over on my bed. I heard foot steps coming from down the hall when my door opened. I looked to see who it was. My heart fluttered in my chest when I saw Jasper.

"I didn't wake you up did I?"he asked. I shook my head and sat up.

"No you didn't I can't sleep,I'm just thinking. That's all." I shrugged.

He flicked on the light and sat besides me. He brushed a strand of hair out of my face.

"Do you want to talk about it?"he asked.

I shrugged,and he laughed. "What?"I asked defensively.

"I don't know. I'm just happy I get to spend some time with you."He smiled.

I blushed and looked away. "You wanna go shopping tomorrow?"he asked me suddenly.

I turned my head toward him slowly and gave him a look of mock shock.

"What?"he teased.

"You wanna go shopping? Wow. That's like a foreign language for me to hear coming out of a man's mouth."I laughed.

He kissed me lightly on the forehead.

"Well, Esme and the others insisted that I take you shopping up at Port Angeles. But I mean if you don't want to that's fine."he shrugged.

I smiled at him and kissed the tip of his nose. "Sure,I'm glad you asked me to go...with you."I said quietly.

He smiled. "If you want you can get your hair cut to."he said absent absentmindedly.

I raised my hand to my hair. It was down to the middle of my back,and I didn't really ever like my hair long. I shrugged. "Sounds like a good idea to me."I said,smiling

He smiled,happy that he didn't offend me with what he said.

"Wanna go now?"he asked,excitement leaking out of his voice.

I laughed. "Sure."

Jasper took my hand and then we ran out of the room to the car.

_Okay...how am I going to do this??_ I ruefully looked through several hair style magazines...three times each. And we still hadn't been called in to get my hair cut. Jasper said it was now big deal which way I got my hair cut. He said 'It'll grow back sooner or later.'

Yeah,he isn't going to be the one stuck with a bad hair do for the next few months.

"Stop worrying. Just pick something out."he whispered to me. I glared at him,he put his hands up in innocence and left me alone to decide.

I sighed with frustration and threw down yet another hair magazine. Jasper sighed too. He reached over next to him and picked up a new magazine. He flipped the page.

"Alice! Get this one!"he said pointing to the first page. I jumped at the sound of his excited voice. I looked at the picture.

I raised an eye brow. A pixie cut huh? "I'm not sure if that would look good on me honey."I said shaking my head with disagreement.

He scoffed. "Yes you would,you would look good with any hair style. But you would look amazing with this one."he said thumping the magazine with his finger.

I looked at it again. I sighed in defeat. "Okay....for you I'd do anything. So I guess I'll get the pixie cut for you."I shrugged.

He laughed and kissed my cheek. "Don't worry,you'll look great with it." he whispered in my ear. I scoffed and nodded in agreement. I already knew that if I started in argument....he would win it. By using other methods...not of the speaking kind.

I blushed at the thought of that. Got when did my mind become so....so _dirty?_

The clerk up at the front desk looked at us,though her eyes were only for Jasper. "You guys can go back now. There's a chair open."she purred,eying Jasper from head to toe.

Anger boiled under my skin,and jealousy burned in my soul. I wanted to waltz over there and stuff her head into the tip jar. But I grumbled and got up with Jasper.

"She your sister?"the clerk asked.

Jasper turned to her,with no interest in his eyes what so ever. "No,she's my girlfriend."he said in an acidic tone. I held back a laugh by putting my hand over my mouth,but it was no use my laughter escaped me and I clamped my hand over my mouth. Surprised by my actions.

_Jasper's POV_

I smiled when Alice tried to hold back her laughter,but failed. The clerk at the counter narrowed her eyes at Alice with anger and fury.

I took Alice's hand in mine and started to walk off to the back. "You can have my number if and when you want some real company."she purred.

I wanted to rip out her throat,but I held back the urge to. I looked back at her with an irritated look on my face. "No thank you. I have no urge to buy cheap company for one night,especially when I have someone right here with me that doesn't throw herself at other men." I said in a casual tone.

Her jaw dropped at my words. I just laughed and took Alice in the back with me.

I felt her emotion of jealousy drop immediately and was replaced by pure joy. I smiled to myself and hid my face from her.

She squeezed my hand once and then let it go. I turned around to see her,she wasn't looking at me. "Are you alright?"I asked.

She didn't turn to look at me,but she nodded.

I took her hand and led her to the nearest open station. I smiled at her smugly. "Have fun getting you hair cut darling."

She blushed and nodded.

About an hour later Alice's hair cut was finished.

I started at her outside the salon. The pixie cut was perfect on her. It cupped her face,showing just how pixish she was and added some cute touch to her short height.

She avoided eye contact with me. Which irritated the hell out of me.

"What's wrong with you?"I demanded.

"Nothing. I just....thinking."she shrugged.

"About?"I edged her on.

She turned to me and finally met my gaze. Though her eyes were wondering and searching for an answer. "I was thinking about what you see in me."she shrugged.

I growled then,deep in my throat. I felt her feeling of doubt. "Alice. Your not some toy I'm going to play with now and throw away later. To me you're beautiful,smart,independent,and among a lot of other things. The list is to long to say all of it."I shrugged.

_Alice's POV_

I gazed into his searing gaze. Finding no lies within the depths of them. They were 100% truthful. But yet I still couldn't bring myself to believe him.

"You don't believe me do you?"he asked me.

I shook my head. "I wish I could Jasper. I really do. But your so handsome...and I'm so plain Jane that I don't know what you even see in me. Plus I'm...not like you at all."I whispered.

He sighed. He looked back at me with eyes of kindness this time. "Alice,can we discuss this when we're done getting everything you need?"he asked merely.

I sighed with frustration and nodded. "Fine. But we're going to discuss this after this,don't you try and think I'll forget this."I said. Pointing a finger at him.

He smiled and kissed my finger. "Promise my love."he said simply.

Then he took my hand and tugged me along.

_AN~~~_

_Eesh. Finally got this chapter done. Thank heavens!!! It took me forever. I saw new moon. OMG it was AMAZING!! I wuved it. Well I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. I'm going to start the next one now!!! bye!!! :) ~FH17_


	16. Chapter 16

_Ch. 16_

We finished our shopping trip in two hours. (record for me.) And with Jasper's driving we were home around 3.

I avoided talking to him all the way back to Forks. He didn't push me so I was fine. I wanted to say that I loved him and that I want to be with him forever.

But saying that would maybe bother him. I don't want anybody else. I want him and only him.

I never experienced these feelings before. I confused and lost. I want to talk to someone about it. Maybe I can talk to Esme about them,because I can't deal with them on my own.

Jasper was sitting on the couch,staring out one of the front windows,and drumming his fingers impatiently on the couch. "Are we going to talk now?"he asked. Turning his head to face me.

I could feel my heart pick up it's pace in my chest. So much for being calm. I nodded,and wiped my clammy palms on my jeans.

I sat next to him,sitting the farthest away possible from him. He sighed and scooted over until he was nearly on top of me.

"I don't like it when you do that."he mumbled.

"Do what?"I asked in a quivery voice. Damn it!

"When you're to far away from me. It makes me uneasy...and agitated."he said scooting even closer to me,and put his arm around my shoulders.

"Now what are we going to talk about?" he asked.

Actually,I've completely lost my train of thought. _He's soooo close and...he's soooo gorgeous. _

I shook those thoughts away quickly and tried to remember what I wanted to discuss with him.

_Oh yeah!!_ I wanted to know what he sees in me.

"I want you to tell me what you see in me. I mean you're so...so godly! And while I'm so....so plain."I said.

He scoffed and kissed my lips quick and hard. "You silly girl! God! I am in love with you already. I see an amazing girl in front of me. Not only gorgeous,but also smart,funny,and so many many other things."he said.

He was now kneeling in front of me,looking me in the eyes earnestly. "Why can't you just accept that I want you for who you are?"he asked taking my hands in his.

Tears sprang into my eyes. "Because I don't know who I am." I whispered.

He gave me a pained look. "What do you mean?"he said cupping my face in his hands.

I sniffed and took in a ragged breath. "I mean...I don't know what I like,dislike. Or any of the basic things that make a person _them_. I don't know who I am. It's been like this sense I got away from that asshole that took my life away. I don't know who I am anymore!"I wailed.

I got up and out of his hold easily. But when I tried to walk away he grabbed my hand and tugged me back to him. "Alice!"he yelled. I stopped struggling against him immediately.

He hugged me tightly and buried his face in my hair. "Alice. You are who you are. You never loose yourself,no matter how much you may not like yourself. You were born you and that's who you'll always be. Now and forever. You don't have to know your likes and dislikes,or any sort of that,to know who you are. All you have to do is act like you've been acting for the time you've been here." he pulled away to see my face. "Because that's who you are,Alice. You."he said.

Tears streamed down my face,making my vision blurry and out of focus. A sob escaped my chest and my legs felt numb all the sudden. I almost fell to my knees when Jasper caught me and took me to the couch.

Another sob escaped me and I cried against his shoulder. "Alice...shhhh. It's okay. You'll find out that soon enough."he said soothingly. I pulled back from him.

"Bite me now."I demanded. He went still,as a statue.

"Alice...you don't know what you're asking me to do to you."he said stiffly.

"Yes I do! Bite me dammit! You said that you want me forever! So do it already. I don't want anybody but you,and I want to keep you forever."I whispered,my voice full of pain.

"Alice! Yes I do want you forever. And I'm very sure of that. But I want you to be able to enjoy at least being human for a while."he whispered. Pulling away from me and standing up.

His body was rigid,yet he still moved with liquid grace that would make even a crane be jealous of his graceful movements. "I'm never going to be able to be happy as a human. I hate being so weak and....different from you."I said.

He turned back to me and gave me a pained look. "Alice,no matter how different you are from me,I will always love you. I knew how I felt about you from the first moment I laid eyes on you. If that's not proof enough for you then I don't know what is."he said,shrugging.

"You knew that you loved me before you even talked to me?"I whispered,half to myself.

He merely nodded. "Of course I did. The smell of your blood is so intoxicating to me. But I have to constantly remind myself that I'm not an animal. I don't lust to drink your blood though. I lust to take your body,and soul."he said.

I felt my cheeks burn intensly from his words. "So you don't want to eat me?"I whispered getting up to take his hand.

He looked at me and smiled. "Of course not. I lust for you,you silly beautiful girl. I don't lust for your _blood_. Though it doesn't taste all that bad."he added with a shrug.

I blushed deeper. That was a first. I never got a compliment on how I tasted.

"So....you.."my voice trailed off. I couldn't figure it out. He wanted _me_?

_Me?_

The thought of it just didn't click in my mind. I just couldn't register it at all.

So he didn't lust for my blood...but for me.

"Alice...do you know what I mean?"he asked with a sigh.

_Jasper's POV_

I felt her unease with the question. But she looked me straight in the eye and shook her head no. I laughed.

"I don't lust to posses your blood,the scent and the taste of it is wonderful..."

I raised my hand to her cheek and cupped her face. "But what my animal instincts yell for me to take is your.....how can I put this?"I said biting my lip.

Relization spread across her face,and her face turned bright red. "My...my virginity?"she squeaked with disbelief.

I laughed with unease as bad as hers. Great.

"Yes basically."I shrugged.

She smiled shyly. And focused on fidgeting her fingers.

"Are....are you hungry...?"I asked,letting my voice trail off.

"A little bit."she said.

I nodded and left her and went into the kitchen.

_Alice POV_

I stood there in silence. Letting all that just happened soak in. My heart was beating loudly in my heart.

Now I needed more than ever to figure out my feelings

_AN~_

_Hi!!! I hope u enjoyed this chapter. Im going to start the next one now!! be sure to review it!!! Please!!_

_~FH17_


	17. Chapter 17

_Ch. 17_

I sat down on the couch,trying to sort out my thoughts.

And I figured out a problem....I'm not a virgin...I was raped...

Did Jasper forget that? Maybe...he just considered me one? I don't know.

I felt _dirty_ now. Now that I'm thinking all of this. I sighed in frustration.

I don't just feel dirty...I _am_ dirty. And now I'm not sure if I can ever lose this feeling.

Jasper came back in then,he avoided looking me in the eye. "Jasper....about what-"

"I'm sorry! I forgot."he said abruptly.

I froze...he _forgot_? He looked at me in the eye then,his eyes filled with guilt and pain.

"I'm so sorry Alice. I forgot that you were raped."he said,his voice merely a whisper.

Tears sprang into my eyes and leaked out uncontrollably. And instead of sobbing,I broke out laughing.

Jasper looked at me shocked. "Why are you laughing?"he asked,dumbstruck.

"I don't know! I just started laughing."I said,I broke out into more laughing and slumped against him.

He wrapped his arms around me and held me close. I could feel his unease while he held me.

I stopped after a few minutes and took in a deep breath. "Are you alright now?"he asked me.

I chuckled and nodded. "Yeah. I don't know what came over me. I just felt so relieved and happy,then I started laughing out of no where."I smiled.

He smiled and kissed my forehead gently. "Okay..well now that episode of weirdness is over..are you still hungry?"he asked.

A mischevious flicker went through me and I smiled. "I am...but not for food."I said.

He raised an eyebrow. "Really? Don't you think you should eat something,before we do any of that?"he asked,his voice going pleasurably

low and gravely.

He kissed my neck,sending chills dancing up and down my spine. I shivered and he laughed,but at the same time it sounded like a growl.

My mind totally went blank when he planted a kiss near the corner of my lips.

Before he could pull away,I took advangtage and took his lips to mine.

This time he really did growl. A deep throaty sound that sounded as if it should belong to an animal.

I locked my arms around his neck,bringing him closer,he moaned into my mouth,only making me hunger for more.

He slid his tounge into my mouth and explored it thorouly. He left my mouth and went down my neck and stopped at the hollow of my throat.

Then he pulled away. I got up and started to object when he just kissed my lips lightly. All of his hunger and urgency gone.

"Why did-"

"Because I don't think it's time to go farther than that."he said,interupting me.

I stuck out my lip,pouting like a small child. He smiled and kissed my lip.

"I'm ready though Jasper."I argued.

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Alice..you have to understand that I could hurt you so badly that you could die."he said through clenched teeth.

I gasped. "Really?"I asked.

_Jasper POV_

I looked at her,and nodded.

Just the thought of hurting her made me sick,all the way down to the pit of my stomach.

"Jasper...do you think that you would actually mean to hurt me?"she said with heavy doubt in her voice.

I snarled then,and animal snarl. She jumped and scooted away a couple of inches. "Don't even doubt that. I'm never going to hurt you again."I spat.

She mouthed the word 'again' then relization passed over her face. "Jasper,when you bit me,you didn't mean to hurt me,and actually...you didn't really hurt me."she lied.

"Liar."I mumbled.

She smiled a small smile and took one of my hands in both of hers. She kissed my knuckles and then pressed my hand to her heart.

"Okay...we'll wait,all long as you want. But just remember,that my heart already belongs to you. Now and forever."she said,sealing that promise with a light kiss on my lips.

That promise...she has no idea what it means to me. If I could cry right now,I would of. I truly love her. And I'm never going to change that.

I kissed her lips again,and slid my tounge into her mouth. She moaned into my mouth,but she stayed were she was,letting me lead.

I kissed her deeply and moved closer to her.

Her scent was imprinted into my mind,and ran through my head so thick that I couldn't think of anything else while I kissed her.

I pulled away and sighed with happiness. I looked at her face. She was smiling and her eyes were closed. She opened her eyes and looked me staight into the eyes.

Her smile widened. "Now I'm hungry for food."she laughed.

I laughed at the sudden statement. Then she started eating.

_Alice POV_

It was now 10 o' clock,and I was tired. Jasper said that the rest of the family would be back sometime tonight or later in the morning.

"Okay...I think I'm going to go to bed now."I said,stretching. I opened one eye and looked at him. "Care to join me?" I added.

He smiled and nodded. "Sure. Why not."he said happily.

I smiled and got up. I ran up stairs and out of his grip when he tired to catch me.

"Hey get back here!"he laughed. I was already up the stairs and starting down the hall when he caught me.

I laughed and giggled when he caught me and picked me up easily into his eyes.

When we got to my bedroom we fell onto the bed and he started to tickle me.

I squealed and tried to fight back but it was useless. Jasper just used one hand to hold my hands together and used the other to tickle me.

After a while,I fell asleep in the arms of the one person I every truly loved with all of my excistence.

_AN~_

_I got this chapter done!! YAY!! Now I'm going to start chapter 2 of _

_Pain Inside the Soul. I hope you like this chapter. Bye!!! :)_


	18. Chapter 18

_Ch. 18_

_Alice POV_

The next morning that approached,I woke up happy. I never woke up as happy as I am now.

Jasper was holding me in his arms and was asleep. I looked at his face and smiled. He looked so peaceful when he was asleep.

He looked as though he was a sleeping angel. _My angel_,I thought. I kissed his lips lightly. His eyes opened at once and he kissed me back.

When I pulled away he growled lightly. "Good morning."I said running my hand through his unruly hair.

He smiled sleepily up at me. "Good morning my fair darling."he said groggily.

I laughed and kissed the tip of his nose. "Are you in a good mood this morning?"I asked.

"Waking up to your kiss...let me think...hmmm....of course I am. I have a beautiful goddess sleeping in my arms. What could make a man any happier?"he asked.

I scoffed and rolled my eyes. "Don't roll your eyes at me. I'm serious. You're beautiful. Why can't you see that?"he asked.

I smiled and sat up. He sat up with me and wrapped me securely in his arms.

"It always boggled my mind when I thought about that. Why can't they see they're beautiful? Especially _you._"he whispered into my ear.

I shivered from the tickle his whisper caused in my ear and kissed his cheek. "I don't know. I just don't think I am. Isn't that a common thing among human females?"I asked.

_Jasper POV_

I gave her a droll look. "That's not what I was getting at,and you know it."I growled. She giggled at my growl and stuck her tongue out at me. "Watch it young lady. Just because I may appear young doesn't mean I'll tolerate such rube behavior."I said in a mock stern tone.

She laughed. "Whatever you say _dad_."

I scoffed. Then kissed her softly. "Don't call me that. That would be _so wrong_ if that were the case."I said.

She chuckled and nodded in agreement. "I must agree with you me dear."she agreed.

I smiled and then pulled her off the bed with me. Then we went out of the room to see our family.

_AN~_

_I kno this chapter is short...very short. But I wanted to make just a short cute chapter just between the two of them,because the other Cullen's are come into the story more now. So back to work for me!! ~FH17_


	19. Chapter 19

_Ch. 19_

_Alice POV_

I grasped Jasper's hand in mine firmly,scared to let if go.

A wave of calm came over me that moment. "Jasper!" I hissed.

"What?"he asked innocently.

"Don't you dare use your powers on me without me knowing it."I hissed.

He stuck out his bottom lip and pouted,badly. But he looked so strange and so cute for doing it I couldn't help but smile and crack up laughing at him.

"You are such a dork."I laughed.

He smiled and pushed me playfully with his shoulder. "Sorry bout that though. I can sense your unease,and I don't like it very much."he admitted,looking away.

I was touched by his reason for it. I stopped him and kissed him lightly on the tip of his nose.

"Thank you for caring about me."I smiled at him. He smiled at me then wrapped his arms around me. He pulled me close and kissed me deeply.

I moaned into his mouth when our lips made contact.. God,his kisses are intoxicating.

He pulled away with a mock pained look on his face. "Alice,I think if I ever made love to you,I'm going to be at your mercy."he breathed.

I laughed and snuggled against him. "I doubt it."I said.

He grunted and hugged me. "Trust me,I know I will be."he said with a honest voice.

I smiled against him. What would I do without him?

_I wouldn't be alive right now without any of them. _That thought came into my mind and stuck there. It's true though. I wouldn't be alive without my family.

A single tear fell from my eyes,for reasons unknown. Jasper wiped the tear away and just silently held me. He didn't ask what the tear was for,he didn't ask me about it. He just held me against him.

I pulled away from him and looked up. "Jasper...I love you. So so much. I don't know what I'd do without you."I whispered to him.

He gave me a confused look. "What's wrong Alice?" he asked.

I looked away,I don't know but I feel like something is going to tear us apart soon. It's just a gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach.

_AN~ _

_I apologize for this chapter being so short and being so late in being put up. I'm not going to lie or make up excuses. I just kept putting it off more and more until I just got to it. So I apologize if the next chapter is late like this one. But I am not putting any of my stories on hold. EVER! I'm going to try to get my head back into the game. Well back to work for me!!_

_~FH17_


	20. Chapter 20

_Ch. 20_ _Alice POV_

I stretched out my limbs when I woke up the next morning. I groaned in displeasure when my body immediately started aching. "Damn,must have slept funny last night." I whispered to myself.

I got up and suddenly a wave of dizziness washed over me. I stumbled into my dresser,banging my elbow. A weird sensation shot through my arm. I yelped and clasped my elbow with my other hand.

"Ow. I hit my funny bone."I whimpered. It's wasn't funny at all,my entire arm felt entirely numb right now.

"Are you alright?" asked a muffled voice. It was Rosalie.

I opened the door and smiled at her. She had a sheepish look on her face,but offered a friendly smile back to me.

"Yeah,I just hit my funny bone on the corner of my dresser."I laughed. She grimaced.

"That sounds painful."she whispered.

I shrugged. "Nothing broken,so I'm good."I said. "Are you alright?" I asked suddenly.

She gave me a surprised look and looked away shyly. "Yes,what makes you think otherwise?"

I shrugged again. "I don't know. It's just that you seem nervous for some reason. Do you need to talk about something? Is that why you came up here?"I asked gently.

"I- uhh....I wanted to see if you were alright first,and....I did want to talk to you as well."she said guiltily.

I smiled. "You don't have to hide it,if you need to talk to me just tell me. Come on in Rosalie,we can talk in here."I said.

She walked in and sat on the bed at once. "So what's up buttercup?"I asked,leaning against my dresser with my arms crossed over my chest.

She kept her eyes down and started twiddling her thumbs.

"I...I wanted to ask you about you and Jasper."she said finally.

I was so stumped by her words I just sat in silence. "Oh....okay...go ahead. Say what you want to be said."I said.

She looked up at me,straight in the eyes. "Are you two....in love? Really,truly in love?"she asked.

"I love him with all my heart Rosalie,I have no doubt in mind about that."I said at once,my voice even and strong.

She offered me a small smile. "You love him so much you're going to be turned?"she asked quietly.

Now that question,truly caught me off guard. "I don't know....I'm not sure if Jasper would want to spent a eternity with me. So I haven't figured out that much yet."I admitted grimly.

"Why not? If you have no doubt that you love him,then why won't you change?! He won't have to watch you grow old and die. He won't have to loose you to the damned thing humans call time! Do you really want to hurt him with your death."she asked,her voice full of pain.

A tear streaked down my face. "Rosalie...you don't understand."I whispered,my voice cracking.

"I don't understand what? That you don't want to stay with my brother forever? Do you know how lucky at the chance you're getting? Most mortals would kill for a chance to live forever."she said in pained voice.

I met her eyes. "Rosalie...I did kill before. It's not something I would ever do again. What's the point of taking someone elses life,to take away the time they were given on this earth...it's selfish to kill. I don't ever want to spill blood on my hands again...so why did you really come up here to talk to me? Did you come up here to lecture me,or are you here to turn me yourself?"I asked,my voice entirely empty.

She stood. "I came up here to talk to you about if you wanted to stay with Jasper....I know that he offered to change you when you're ready. But if you refuse...you'll kill him so much. I did think about just biting you myself. But Jasper would never forgive me for turning you against your will.....but as long he would be happy....I would be willing to take those risks. But as I thought about it more and more,I didn't want to betray my brother..."she said,letting her words trail off..

"Rosalie...were is everybody else?"I asked.

"They're out hunting. I stayed behind to watch you,at Jasper's request. He left the hunt early last time because he was worried about you. So he arranged for you to have company."she said.

I growled. "More like a babysitter."I said grimly.

"I'm sorry if what I was saying was to personal..."she said suddenly.

I shrugged. "I don't blame you. It's fine,this the first time we really talked. It's not really how I pictured it,but at least I talked to you more than a mere two words."I said brightly.

"Goodness,human's moods change so quickly..it's amazing how you can be angry one second than happy the next."Rosalie said with amusement.

"I'm glad I amuse you my sister."I said dryly. She laughed.

"Don't take it as a bad thing. I hardly ever find anything amusing anymore. You're quiet a delight to have around the house of late."she smiled sweetly.

I smiled back at her. "That's a good thing then,right?"I asked curiously.

She nodded. "For me yes. I hardly find anything funny at all anymore,and the rest of us all love you as one of our own."she said simply.

I sighed. "Well that's good. I'm glad I fit in here. I barley fit in with my other family."I said.

"You didn't get along with your real family?"she asked in surprise.

"Actually,no not at all. We butted heads all the time and never agreed on anything. I think that's why the sheriff thought I had just up and ran from my parents that day."I shrugged.

"But you didn't,I don't even think you'd purposely get yourself kidnapped by some idiot asshole."Rosalie hissed angrily.

"Yeah,but there's nothing I can do about it. I can't change his mind about it. I'm just glad that it's all over and I can at least attempt to have a normal life."I said.

"I guess so,but I still don't like the fact that they think you did that. It's so stupid."she growled.

I shrugged. "Nothing I can do about it,like I said it's not my decision of what he wants to think. I don't really care as long as he doesn't try to drag old painful memories up again. Because I don't want to relive them anymore."I said simply.

She nodded. "That's good. It's good that you can be so strong about it. Just remember that you always have us to help you and to back you up."she said before she left the room.

I closed the door behind her and leaned against the door. Tears started streaming down my face,but I held the sobs back.

Rosalie thinks I'm strong...but I'm not. Just one reminder of those horrible nights and I'll break down. It's horrible,and I can't shake the memories. Hopefully when Jasper comes home,he'll ease my mind.

!!!!!!!

_Hi there everybody!! :) I hope you liked this chapter...i'll get more up soon,so just be patient. I can't wait to read you're reviews!!!! ~Fictionheart17_


	21. Chapter 21

_Chapter 21_

_Alice POV_

I bit my lip,like I've been doing _all_ weekend.

Waves of nervousness churned in my stomach so much it burned.

_Damn...why am I so nervous?_

Jasper put his hand in mine,and he sent a wave of calm through me. I didn't bother to scold him for it. He didn't like to feel me all nervous,or any bad emotion at all. And scolding him was pointless,because he just gave me these big puppy dog eyes and told he loved me and didn't want me to feel any pain.

And of course,I turn to jelly from his words and tell him it's fine. That's because,I love him so much.

I smiled out the window of Edward's Volvo,keeping it hidden away from Jasper.

Though,I knew he felt the shift in my emotions.

He gave my hand a gentle squeeze of reassurance.

"Excited about your first day of school?"Emmett asked.

I looked up at him and nodded. "Yeah,pretty much. But I'm nervous at the same time. I'm not even sure if I'll make any friends."I said.

Rosalie tsked me when I started biting my lip again. "You're going to rip up your lip if you keep doing that. Now cut that out. Jasper won't much appreciate that."she said,with a teasing tone in her voice.

Jasper laughed. "Got that right."he said.

I felt heat burn over my face,good god...they're horrible!

I took my hand from Jasper's and hid my face in my hands,than turned to look out the window as we approached the school.

Kids poured into the building from the parking lot.

A lump formed in my throat...oh shit..._that's a lot of people_.

"Calm down sweetie,you'll be fine."Bella cooed soothingly.

I nodded and looked away from the large crowd that seems bigger by the second.

Edward parked smoothly in a spot away from all of the cars on the far end of the parking lot,and everyone started to stare.

"Why are they all staring?_" _I asked frantically,cowering back into Jasper.

He chuckled and ran his fingers gently down my cheek. "They do this every day we come to school."he said.

I gave him a glare. "You could have warned me,dammit."I growled.

Rosalie held back laugh.

Jasper just nuzzled my cheek with his lips. "Sorry,I didn't want to make you even more nervous. I thought you had enough on your plate enough."

"Yeah,yeah. Sure whatever."I said,getting out of the car quickly.

I walked at a fast pace to get up to the school.

"Alice!"Jasper called after me.

I ground my teeth together to keep myself from answering him,and I walked straight into the crowd to the office.

_Or at least I tried...._ because I have no clue where the office is....shit!

I looked around slowly,taking in my surroundings. I noticed a red headed boy talking to a pretty brunette,he looks nice enough...maybe he could help me out?

I listened for Jasper before I walked over to them,don't know why I did that though.

I walked over to them a minute later.

"Um,excuse me,can you tell me were the student office is?"I asked.

They both looked at me. The boy smiled kindly,but the brunette he was talking to stared me down like she's about to kill me.

"Yeah,it's all the way down the hall and you take a right. Okay?"he said.

I nodded. "Thanks so much."I said,than I walked away from them.

_Jasper POV_

Anger bubbled under my skin. I couldn't stand seeing Alice talking to another male. But she'd only asked him for directions,nothing else.

Let's hope it stayed that way.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_ I thought.

I love Alice,very deeply. But I don't own her,so why am I so jealous? Even though she tells me that she loves me just the same amount?

I shook those thoughts away. I'm not going to start doubting Alice's feelings for me.

Not now,not ever.

_Alice POV_

I walked through the office door,only to be bombarded with a wave of dry heat.

"Oh my god."I gasped. The air was so thick and dry it made my throat feel drier than a desert right off the bat.

The secretary looked at me and smiled grimly.

"I know,the air in here is horrible."she said.

I nodded. "Yeah it is. You guys need a humidifier in here,maybe several."I laughed.

She smiled warmly. "So true. Now what can I do for ya hon?"she asked.

She got up and walked over to the counter.

"Oh right,I'm a new student,and I need...I have no idea what I need."I said.

She laughed. "You must be Alice Cullen then. Just take this pink slip and get it signed by all of your teachers,return it here at the end of the day. Oh and here's your schedule."she added,handing me a piece of pink paper and a piece of white.

I nodded. "Thank you. See you later."I said.

"Have a good day at school!"she called out to me.

I smiled as I walked down the hall. What a nice lady...wait...were secretaries at school ever that nice? I shrugged.

I looked at my schedule:

1 Biology Mr. Banner

2 English Mrs. Fields

3 Algebra Mrs. Barlow

4 History Mr. Forrester

Lunch

5 Gym

6 Study Hall

I reread the schedule twice. Was Study Hall even considered a class?

And if it was...what do you do in there? Just study and sit around.

Aw man...high school is going to _suck_.


	22. Chapter 22

_Ch. 22_

_Alice POV_

I walked into biology class a few minutes before the bell rang and walked over to Mr. Banner's desk.

He was sitting down,his attention only for his computer. I stood in front of his desk,and he didn't even notice me.

_That's just great...I'm invisible already_.

I cleared my throat.

Mr. Banner jumped and looked up at me startled. "Uh..can I help you?"he asked.

I nodded,and silently handed him my pink sheet. "I'm a new student. You have to sign this sheet,please."I said,my voice nothing more than a quiet whisper.

He nodded and reached for the slip in my hand. Panic gripped at my throat and I let the piece of paper slip from my hand on to his desk. I tried to calm my breathing but I failed.

My throat closed in on itself and cut off my air supply. I made a choking noise and stepped back a step and landed on a desk,still trying to breath.

My vision started becoming hazy and started to dim. Just as I thought that I would fall into the deep dark pit,someone's voice reached out to me.

"Alice,you're okay honey. He's not going to hurt you." the person whispered into my ear.

And I then remembered that voice.

_Jasper_....

I looked into the darkness that had engulfed me and there he was. My vision once again came back to me and I could see again.

The panic stricken knot in my throat loosened considerably and I started breath,taking deep gasps of air down my throat.

My senses returned and I felt Jasper's arms around my waist. He was rocking me in his arms,and I was pulled against him,he was saying calming words to me.

I tried to say something,but no words came out...but a sob did.

Jasper held me tightly and I held onto him like a life line,and if I let go of him,i think I'd fade off into that horrible dark place for the rest of eternity.

"Mr. Banner,I'm going to take Alice home now. And if she's feeling better tomorrow she'll be here,if not,neither us will be here. Is that alright sir?"I heard Jasper ask.

I didn't hear Mr. Banner's reply,just a wordless mumble to my ears.

I felt Jasper's lips brush lightly over mine. "Sleep my Alice. You're safe now."he said.

I mumbled something incoherently,I hope he heard it.

Because I said: "Thank you,I love you."

_Jasper POV_

My anger melted away when Alice mumbled those words to me,and my killing instincts once again became buried,and the boy that talked to _my _Alice would live another day.

Because she _is mine._

_Mine_.

And I don't plan on letting some other male take my place,ever. Unless she ends our relationship first.

I held Alice close to me as I walked out of school,not caring that every pair of eyes stared after Alice and I. But the stares came from both students and teachers alike.

_Fuck them,_I thought.

I walked over to the Volvo and got in,Edward was there and handed me the keys silently.

And said before he left: "Just bring the car back before school lets out."

I set Alice into the passenger seat and kissed her lightly on the lips,when I pulled away I could see she was smiling in her sleep.

My heart,I swore beat once and swelled with emotion so great that it hurt when I breathed.

Good god,I love her so much....

The drive home was quick and quiet. Alice didn't make a sound as I drove her back home.

When I pulled up the house,Esme was standing in the doorway of the front door.

"What happened? Everything alright?"she asked me.

"No,not really."I said thickly. I got Alice out of the car gently,careful not to jerk her awake,because she needed sleep,she had enough today.

I heard Esme's sharp intake of breath when I turned around with Alice in my arms.

"What happened?"she asked,she rushed up to me and looked at Alice with fear.

"Mom,she's fine. Here take her. She had a panic attack at school,I'm going to take Edward's car back to school and I'll be home as soon as I can."I said.

Esme took Alice in her arms gently and cradled her like a baby.

"What should I tell her if she wakes?"she asked as I got back into the car.

I smiled gently. "Tell her I'll be back real soon. But I doubt she's going to wake up this soon. I'll be back in a flash."I said.

Esme nodded than turned around without a word and walked into the house.

_Alice POV_

_My eyes opened,and all I see is white...nothing else. _

_A voice chided to me,but it was just to low for me to hear clearly. I tried to open my eyes but I....couldn't._

_Fear quivered it's way down into the pit of my stomach,making me want to throw up._

"_Hello?"I said._

_My voice echoed...even though there was nothing there to echo off of._

_Still...I see nothing. Just a blank white canvas. _

_I fell silent and listened,waiting for someone to answer._

_Please,god. Let there be someone here to answer me. I don't want to be alone._

_And as the minutes ticked by...the silent grew heavier until it felt like it was choking me._

_A single tear slid down my face,but I held my sob in. _

"_Please....I don't want to be alone."I said,my voice thick with tears._

"_You're not alone Alice...you'll always have me."_

_I went frozen all over....that voice..._

_I know that voice._

"_Don't cry Alice,you have no need for that. I'm here for you,just like I've always been here for you."_

_A sob broke free,and I jerked around._

_When I saw who it was,I screamed bloody murder....._


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

_Alice POV_

_When I saw who it was, I screamed blood murder…._

_I sobbed loudly when I was done screaming, just standing there with him…_

_He was just like I remembered him….face covered by darkness…and a voice that made my skin want to melt right off._

_Even though his face was darkened, I could see the smile that was on his face._

"_Alice, don't be scared. I'll _always_ be with you..." he said, his voice making me skin burn with disgust. _

_He took a step toward me, causing me to step back._

"_Alice, don't do that. You don't want to make me angry. Remember? You didn't like it when I was angry." He said, menace slipping into his voice._

_Yes, I remember very well. Memories of him beating me and raping came into mind, whenever he was angry…he was even more brutal to me._

_But I shook them from my mind, and stood my ground. _

"_Alice, come here...I want you again. Do you remember how much we loved each other? I loved you so much more than everybody else." He said, taking another step toward me._

_I took another step back. I felt terrified…and helpless. _

_I don't want to be trapped again…_

"_Alice! Don't step away from me!" he yelled._

_I cringed back, terror taking over my reflexes._

_He yelled in anger, and ran at me. _

_I screamed loudly, my throat still raw from the last scream. My throat burned as the scream tore out of my throat._

_I took off running off into nowhere. Just running into the bleak white place that was nothing._

_Jasper POV_

When I ran back to the house, my mind was at ease that Alice was okay. I hope she was feeling better; maybe she was awake right now even, I hope so.

I stopped in front of the door, and heard a scream.

"Alice!" I gasped.

I ran inside and up the stairs to her bedroom.

When I opened the door I saw her writhing on her bed and screaming in pain.

"Alice! Honey wake up!" I yelled. I ran over to her and held her down with my hands.

But she screamed even louder and her struggle increased.

_Alice POV_

_I tried to run away as fast as I could, but hands suddenly grabbed me from behind me. I screamed and struggled to get free._

"_Alice! Stop this! You know you love me! I love you! Don't leave me you insolent bitch!" he hissed._

_I screamed again. "Let me go!" I sobbed. I struggled more, until I finally got my foot up and kicked him straight in the balls._

_He yelled in rage. _

"Alice! Alice! Honey stop screaming! It's just a dream!" yelled a voice that echoed through the empty void.

Jasper!

_I looked around frantically. "Jasper! Help me! He's after me!" I yelled._

_I started running again; he was coming again with a yell of rage._

"Alice! It's your dream; you can change it to anything you want!" Jasper yelled.

_A dream? What is he talking about? Is he nuts? It sure doesn't feel like a fucking dream._

_I stopped and stopped crying. I focused on waking up…._

_Jasper POV_

As I held Alice down even harder, not enough to hurt her but just to keep her still her struggles stopped being so severe.

I released some of my hold on her, when I sat back all the way….Alice's eyes opened.

She looked up at me.

Her eyes at once glistened with tears, and her lips started quivering.

Sobs came forth from her, and my heart ached for her.

"Alice." I said my voice hoarse.

She sat up and jumped into my arms. She took me by surprise.

I wrapped my arms around her; she buried her face in my neck and sobbed against me.

I put one hand in her hair and rubbed her back comfortingly with the other.

"Shh, Alice…you're okay." I cooed.

She shook against me when she pulled back. She had a bunch of tears running down her face, and more came.

"N-no I-I'm n-n-not, J-jasper…t-that w-w-was t-the m-most h-orrible d-dream I-I've e-ever h-had." She said.

"Alice…I'm so sorry that you had that god awful dream." I said, not knowing what other words to tell her.

She sniffed. "I wish I could never sleep again." She said.

I stiffened. "No you don't Alice." I said my voice ruff.

She pinned me with a glare so angry it was plain as day in her eyes.

"Yes I do! You have no idea what it's like to have dream like that! Fearing that the damn bastard who raped you might come back to get you! Jasper you have no fucking clue of what it's like living in fear like this! I feel like he's going to come out of nowhere when I'm out of the house and grab me. And that scares the hell out of me. I'd never be able to see you again. And that would kill me dammit." She said, her voice filling with tears again.

I stayed silent. "Jasper…I'm so sorry….I don't have any right to yell at you. It's just I'm so scared that will happen." She said.

I looked up at her, feeling my gaze harden. "No one will ever touch you." I said my voice nothing but a mere hiss.

_Alice POV_

I shivered at the intensity of Jasper's gaze. When he hissed those words, I couldn't help but smile at him.

He looked away, as if ashamed of his words. I scooted onto his lap. He kept his eyes directed away from me. I put my hand on either side of his face, shocking him all the more.

But me cupping his face got his attention. He turned back to me and looked at me confused.

I smiled and pressed my lips to his.

_Jasper POV_

My mind went blank when Alice's lips touched mine.

My vampire instincts roared up, causing me to take control.

I got onto the bed before Alice could even gasp in a breath. She smiled against my lips, causing me to growl.

She took pleasure in making me lose control, which had rarely happened before her.

She turned my world totally upside-down. She was totally unexpected. But I cherish her with all my being.

If she died….I don't think that I'd be able to carry on anymore.

I pulled away, my breathing coming in short harsh gasps. God she drove me nuts.

"I love you." I whispered.

She pressed her lips to mine again, and wrapped her legs around my waist. "I know.


	24. Chapter 24

_Chapter 24_

_Alice POV_

I sat straight up in bed; sweat drenched me and my body.

I just had another nightmare about my kidnapper.

This is only the second time this has happened, but it still terrifies me to death.

If he comes back…I'm dead.

I put my hand over my mouth to hold back my sob, if any one of my family heard me, they would come storming in like a swat team. And that's the last thing I need.

I got up and held in my cries. I went out to the balcony at my window and went outside, then letting my sobs free.

Why does this have to happen? Why can't I just be happy with my family? Why does the memory of this bastard have to haunt me?

WHY! WHY!

I held my head in my hands and screamed as loud as I could.

When I stopped, I felt arms come around me comfortingly.

"Jasper…why are you up here?" I asked.

I felt him shrug. He pulled me up against me and held me.

"Did you have that nightmare again?" he asked, whispering in my ear.

I shivered, wanting him so badly.

"Yes. I did." I said.

He nodded, and rubbed his lips against my cheek in a comforting caress.

He placed a light kiss on my cheek and breathed in my scent. "I love you." He said his voice barely audible.

I smiled and leaned against him. "I love you too." I said in his ear.

He smiled and kissed me.

His lips were gentle on mine, like a butterfly going gently over a flower, so careful as if not to damage the petals.

The only problem was, I didn't like to be treated like a tiny flower that would wilt if handled to roughly. I'm not a flower; I won't wilt before Jasper's eyes if he treated with a little less care.

He pulled away, and hugged me tighter. "So…we were talking downstairs..." he said, trailing off.

I arched an eyebrow. "And what about?" I prompted.

He gave me a gentle smile. "Try not to be to upset; we were talking about letting you get homeschooled instead of going to the public high school. We thought that you'd like it better if you could actually learn something and not have to worry about getting another panic attack." He said, being as gentle with his voice as he could.

But not good enough that I didn't hear the reluctant tone in his voice.

He didn't like the idea of being away from me for six hours a day during the week.

I nodded and looked away from him, pulling away from his penetrating gaze.

He could see right through me.

He nudged me with his shoulder slightly. "So Alice, what do you think of that idea? Esme brought it up…I don't much like the idea of being away from you for six hours every week day, but if you want you can be home schooled. I wouldn't bother me….much." he said.

Ah ha, knew it. He didn't like the idea at all; he was just sugar coating it so I wouldn't feel bad if I did choose to do that.

"You're lying. You don't mind just a little, you mind _a lot_" I said teasingly.

He growled something under his breath.

"Damn, you saw right through my ploy. What am I going to do now?" he asked.

I laughed. "No, I didn't _see_ through your ploy, I _heard_ through it." I said.

He laughed. "Okay smart ass." He said jokingly.

I smiled and kissed him on the cheek. He rubbed his cheek over the top of my head.

And all the sudden, he picked me up into his arms.

"Jasper! What are you doing?" I squawked. He laughed as I tried to wiggle my way out of his grip.

"I'm tucking you back into bed. You need to sleep, and you need to think about that idea proposal." He said.

I scoffed. "Okay, fine…but I don't think that I can sleep with you in the room." I said.

He barked out laughter. "Don't you think that I know that? That's why I'm going to wait until dawn to come give you a worthwhile awakening." He said, his voice husky, and sending chills up my spine.

"I like the sound of that. Now leave, I have to sleep. I love you." I said, snuggling into my bed.

He chuckled darkly. "Okay, love you too." He said.

He pressed a light kiss to my temple, and before I knew it he was gone.

I sat for hours in bed, not able to sleep. Jasper had left me alone over 3 hours ago. And I haven't gotten a single wink of sleep since then.

I tossed and turned in my bed, trying to get comfortable so I could fall asleep. No such luck.

Damn….

I tossed back the covers and sat there, taking in deep breaths.

My skin was suddenly scalding with overheating, and a layer of sweat already formed on my whole body.

I growled and sat up on the edge of my bed.

I walked over to the balcony again, and opened it.

At once, a cool calm wind blew against my over heated skin.

I sighed with relief of the heat.

"Not a smart thing to do…" hissed a creamy voice.

I jumped and looked next to me.

Before I could scream, something hit me square in the head, knocking me unconscious.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

Jasper POV

I sat in the darkness of my bedroom, my thoughts all about Alice.

I wanted so much to change her hear and now, to fulfill her wish to never be able to sleep again.

But acting to harshly will result in some major damage. She doesn't know how much she would miss sleeping once it was gone.

She would never again be able to dream again once she was turned. But then if she changed, she would have no fear of getting taken again. She'd have more than enough strength to kill anybody that tried to take her.

Well except another vampire of course. But I don't like the thought of her worrying every where she goes. Humans…sometimes it's a wonder that they haven't gotten themselves all killed.

I shifted my thoughts off less depressing things.

Alice was safe and sound, and also happy. That's all that matters to me. That's she's safe, well, and happy.

Her wellbeing matters everything to me, nothing else can compare to how I feel about her.

I don't know if that's really love or not, but I don't care. I would do anything for Alice.

Even if that meant to kill another that meant to reach out and hurt my Alice.

She is mine, no doubting it at all.

She has sealed her fate when she said she loved me. Not saying that's a bad thing, but she really is stuck with me until the end.

But I doubt that there will ever be an ending to our story.

Since I have no plans on letting either me or her die anytime soon.

I sat up in the bed that I've never really slept in; I just use it to lie on when I think. Nothing more.

Since we vampires don't need to ever sleep.

I groaned as the urge to go see Alice washed over me, not just to see Alice, but to _take_ Alice.

I can't be near her right now, it's best to stay away.

I sat in the darkness for a few minutes.

Then I heard a distant thunk.

I sprang into action, and ran to Alice's room.

_Alice POV_

I drifted in a deep sleep, unable to wake up from it. No matter how much I wanted to.

A dull aching pain illuminated from the back of my head, and throbbed.

I clenched my eyes shut, now that I was waking up, I didn't want to.

"Alice, wake up Alice."

My eyes shot open, and fear washed over me in an instant wave that thundered across my body. Making adrenaline pump through my veins and made my body clench with anticipation of the worse.

I knew that voice…it's _his _voice.

I jerked up and looked around. I was in the same small shack again, only this time, I was pinned to the floor with shackles over my wrists and ankles.

"Tsk, tsk, Alice. You don't want to try and escape from me do you? That wouldn't be a very good thing to do. After all, I can kill you." He said.

I was mortified, completely immobile.

He could take complete advantage of me, and there was no way I could fight back.

He had one…he had gotten me again. There is now way that I'm going to be able to escape him this time.

He laughed loudly. "Broken you will already have I Alice? I figured that you'd be stronger and harder to break than this. After all, when I saw you at school, in my class I was surprised. None of the other students had noticed you, but I sure did. Being a teacher and all, I notice more things than most my students, and my co-workers. Mike Newton is the one who told me that you were there, stupid of him to tell me. Otherwise I wouldn't have known you were there." He cooed to me.

I stifled back a sob, and struggled to stay quiet.

He was a _teacher._ A _teacher_ had done all this to me for the past 4 years.

Had kept me locked up and raped me.

My fear was heightened all the more at this thought.

And when he struck me, I screamed.

_Jasper POV_

I stopped dead when I got into Alice's room.

She's gone. I held back a roar of outrage, that my vampire instincts demanded be let loose.

I breathed in a deep breath, taking in Alice's scent and some foreign males.

My eyes opened wide with shock when I recognized the scent.

Mr. Forrester!?


	26. Chapter 26

Ch. 26

Jasper POV

My vampire instincts roared to life, my line of sight turned red.

My lust for blood soared within me….

Someone had taken my mate, forcefully.

I let my animalistic instincts take over, and I fell back into them, letting them lead me. I know that I would never hurt Alice.

I'd kill myself before I ever did that. And I know that if I do track Mr. Forrester down, I will kill him. And I most likely will bite Alice to change her.

Mr. Forrester has to die, no second guessing about it. His life will come to an end. He has reached far beyond his allowed boundaries. Anyone who dares touch my mate to intentionally hurt her, is dead, drained, gone. For good.

I ran outside on to the balcony adjoined to Alice's room. Her scent was a little stale; she was taken over an hour ago. I hissed deep in my throat, and when Mr. Forrester's scent came to my nose, the urge to kill grew all the more stronger.

Alice's fear, along with the scent of her tears, washed in with rain drifted over to me.

If I could cry, I would. My love was gone, but not for long.

I will find her; kill the bastard that hurt her, end of story.

I breathed in the scents around me, singling out Mr. Forrester's.

And then I took off running into the night, with the full intent of spilling the blood of the one who had hurt my Alice.

_Mine_.

_Alice POV_

A dull pain throbbed in the back of my head, and I couldn't remember what had happened.

All I could remember is seeing the man that had taken me, then bam! Nothing after that.

A cold chill slowly dripped through me, paralyzing every single molecule of my entire being.

He had gotten me again, and there was no hope of ever being able to see Jasper again. The dream of spending eternity with him was over. Because tonight, I'm dead, no doubt about it.

Four years ago when he took me, he told me that if I ever ran away, and he found me, he's kill me right on the spot.

I urged myself to wake up, but I couldn't. Or was I awake, but I just couldn't see anymore.

Sobs welled up within my chest, and burst from me when I couldn't hold out any longer.

"Shh! Alice shut up! Your wretched bitch!" he screamed.

I didn't listen though. So when I didn't listen, he struck me across the face, hard.

I wailed in pain. My jaw felt dislodged from where it was supposed to be connected.

That only made me wail even harder. "Why! Why do you want me! Why can't you just kill me you bastard!" I wailed, my jaw burning with ever word I screamed.

"Shut up! Shut up!" he screamed, he hit me again.

He struck me across the face again, harder than before, forcing another wail of pain from me.

Tears leaked out from my eyes now, and I sobbed uncontrollably.

Why, why can't I see? Tears didn't fall down my cheeks; they stayed gathered around my eyes.

I was blindfolded.

"Alice, don't you understand that you're mine and no one else's? You and I were meant to be together. You and I, not you and Jasper Cullen." He spat in outrage.

I flinched and let out another wail, afraid he was going to hurt me.

Instead, I felt his hands grip my face, hard. Hard enough to make my jaw scream in pain. "Ah!" I yelped.

He brought my face forward, I tried to worm out of his hold, but he held strong.

"No Alice, listen to me. You were meant for me, not for Jasper. You've been mine sense the day you were born. That day when I saw you at the shopping mall, dressed all pretty in that little white dress and black shoes, I fell in love instantly. You attracted me more than anyone else had. Those six women before you, they meant nothing to me. You mean the most to me, and I will make you mine. We can have children and life happily ever after." He said, his voice in awe from the mere picture that he had in mind.

But the only thing that he didn't know was, I'm infertile.

"No, no! We can never have children. I'm infertile, I was born that way. I can't produce eggs for children." I said.

He growled and struck me hard across the face again. "Don't say such things Alice. We'll steal other's people's kids if we have too. You will not ruin my dream of us having a family together. You hear me! You will not ruin it!" he screamed.

"YES I WILL! You son of a bitch! I will _never_ love you. I hate you! I hate you with my entire existence! I'd rather spend an eternity in hell then spend a life time with you! You sick son of a bitch! Die you mother fucker!" I screamed.

I heard his harsh intake of breath."You don't mean that Alice. Jasper planted a bad seed in your mind, telling you lies that I was the bad guy, but I'm not honey. I'm the good guy that's taken care of you for all these years." He said.

He touched me gently on the cheek. I screamed loud enough to get him to jerk away. "I mean every single word that I said. I'd rather die than see you disgusting face ever again. I hope you rot in hell alone! You bastard! You sicken me! You're a mother fucking asshole! I hate you! I hate you! Everything about you! I hope you die!" I screamed.

Even though it sounded as though I had courage, I don't possess any at this moment. I'm scared shitless. I'm only yelling for one reason. I hope he kill me. I don't want to live without Jasper.

Without him, life is useless. He's all I have to live for.

He hit me again when I stopped screaming.

And after that…

A roar of fury ripped through the air.


	27. Chapter 27

_Ch. 27_

_Alice POV_

A huge roar of fury ripped through the air.

I stayed silent at the sound, scared out of my wits.

The roar sounded guttural and animal like. My fear went up more levels then I have ever thought possible.

"What have you done to my Alice?"

I jumped at the voice. It was Jasper, he was here.

To save me. My fear melted away at once.

"Jasper?" I said, my jaw aching from the forming the words.

My voice was hushed and silent, but I knew he could hear me.

"It's me Alice, don't worry. I'm here for you baby. Now take off that blindfold Mr. Forrester, before I kill you." He growled.

I shivered at the thought of that man touching me. But the blindfold was gone in a blink of an eye.

Jasper stood so near me, I could almost literally feel his anger pressing up against me.

I wasn't scared of him at all, because I knew that he wouldn't hurt me.

My captor was another story; he was quivering in fear in the corner not too far away from me, holding the blindfold that had been over my eyes.

Jasper was over to me in a blink of an eye, and I was in his arms the next. "Close your eyes Alice." He said. "You're safe now."

I quivered against him, but did as he asked. I heard the sound of a gun getting ready to fire, and then the deafening sound of bullets being fired rang out through the air.

Jasper kept shooting until the gun would shoot no more.

"Is he dead?" I asked, my voice quivering just as my body was.

I heard Jasper put away the gun back into his pocket.

"He is now, definitely. I wouldn't just let him walk away after taking you away Alice. You're mine; no one else gets to touch you. You're safe now. So don't worry. Keep your eyes closed; we'll be somewhere else soon. Now sleep." He ordered.

Like I really had a choice. He used his powers to spread a wave of calm over me, and I suddenly felt very sleepy.

So in other words, I fell asleep.

_Jasper POV_

I felt Alice slump in my arms. Which is exactly what I wanted. I looked over at Mr. Forrester, he was staring at me lifelessly, but his face was drawn in complete horror.

That look pleased me. I had made it pain full when I shot him, hitting him in places where he wouldn't bleed out so quickly.

But my temper had gotten the better of me. So I shot him in both his thighs, and once in the forehead right between the eyes.

The other had gone into his shoulders.

I wish he had stayed alive so I could've tourchered him more, make him suffer as he made Alice suffer.

He's lucky he's dead; I could've done a lot worse than I had done just moments before.

I would've loved to have tortured him, but now it was too late. So I would just settle with taking his life.

I wiped the gun off with on some cloth that was hanging on the chair Alice had been tied too, and used it to hold the gun away from my hand so I could slide it across the floor toward Mr. Forrester.

My scent doesn't matter; it will become stale before anybody finds a body here.

I was outside in a flash, I spotted a car that was one of many in the parking lot just a few yards away and picked the lock on the door.

I set Alice inside the car, and then left her sleeping figure in the passenger seat.

I took out a lighter of my pocket and took the gasoline I had gotten before coming in to the warehouse.

I spilled it everywhere throughout the place, mostly over Mr. Forrester's corpse, and then I lit the lighter and set the bastard to flame.

_Alice POV_

My eyes drifted open to some where unfamiliar. My fear came back to me in a flash.

I started quivering all over. Where is Jasper? I thought frantically.

I sat up; it was dark except a single strand of moon light shining through a window.

I couldn't really see anything. But I was in a bed, not tied up to a chair.

"J-jasper?" I said in a quivering voice.

I felt an arm snake around my waist, and held me gently, but didn't pull me anywhere.

Just by the feel of calmness that overcame me. I knew it was Jasper.

"Can you turn on the light?" I asked.

I blinked and the light was on, pouring light into my light sensitive eyes. I blinked to clear my vision of the small spots that were dancing in my line of vision and looked over at Jasper.

He was looking at me with concern, and he was trembling slightly.

"Jasper?" I asked gently.

He didn't say anything; instead he leaned in close and pressed his lips to mine.

I moaned and wrapped my arms around his neck.

He pressed his hard muscled body up against mine, and I just realized something.

He was shirtless.

His tongue slid passed my lips and explored my mouth with painful patience. His lips were gentle, unyielding.

My hunger for him grew, and I started to crave more than a single deep kiss. I wanted to be one with him, right here, right now. For eternity.

He broke his mouth away from mine, and started forming a blazing trail of kisses from my mouth to my neck.

I arched into him and moved my head to the side to give him better access to my neck.

He licked and nibbled on the artery there, making my pulse jump and race even faster.

My heartbeat was so loud, I felt as though instead of in my chest, my heart was right in my ear.

Jasper growled when he took my mouth again, and he plundered it just as he had before.

When he pulled away, I whimpered from the loss.

I sat up when he got off the bed. "Jasper? What's wrong?" I asked.

He was standing, his body taunt.

"I want you to much to do this right now." He said his voice guttural.

I smiled gently, and started unbuttoning the flannel shirt that was definitely Jaspers.

I threw it to the floor and slid the pajama pants down my legs and threw them on the floor alongside the shirt.

_Jasper POV_

I heard the sound of fabric being shed. I stiffened, what the hell is she doing?

I turned my head around over my shoulder to see and my mouth started salivating.

She was in nothing but her underwear, and she was smiling at me gently.

"If you turn me down Jasper, when I'm already basically undressed. I'll never speak to you again. Now get over here and make love to me. Please." She pleaded.

I turned around all the way to look at her. I gave her a hot once over look. "Are you sure Alice, because if I start now, I won't be able to stop. You know that right?" I said, starting to slide my pants down.

She smiled without hesitation, and nodded.

"I'm positive Jasper. I love you. Now get over here." She said.

I didn't wait for another invitation. I was on top of her before she could even blink.

She giggled and slid her body seductively against me.

I groaned and then undressed her the rest the way.


	28. Chapter 28

Ch. 28

_Alice POV_

When I woke up the next morning. I felt glorious. My body ached pleasurably. Memories of last night came back to me, and I smiled.

Jasper wound his arm around me when I moved only the slightest inch. He pressed a light kiss to my forehead. "Good morning my beautiful Alice." He whispered into my ear.

I giggled; I've never felt so giddy in all my life. "Morning to you too Jasper." I said, lifting my head.

He smiled and pressed a deep kiss to my lips. "Last night was incredible Jasper. Thank you." I said against his mouth.

He pulled away and looked over my naked body that was interwoven with his. "I didn't hurt you did I?" he asked, his voice raw.

I chuckled, and kissed his cool cheek. "No you did not. It was amazing, and I felt no pain what so ever." I said sincerely.

He gave me pained look. "Are you sure? I didn't hurt you one bit?" he asked, gently stroking my bare shoulder with his cool fingers.

I scoffed at him. "Jasper, stop worrying. You didn't hurt me at all. I promise." I said gently.

He grumbled something to himself then nodded at me. "Okay, fine I'll let it go this once." He said.

I laughed. "Just let it go all of the times Jasper. You didn't hurt me. Just believe me and get on with it." I said.

"Fine." He said tersely.

"That's what I thought." I said, giving him a light tap on his cheek.

We stayed silent for a while, and it was growing heavy and awkward. "Do we have to go back?" Jasper asked suddenly.

I looked at him, confused. "Go back where?"

H e sat up, and pulled me against him. "You know, back to Forks. I don't want to go back there, to make you remember all those horrible memories. And I want to stay here, anywhere else but there with you." He said, burying his face into my hair.

"What about Esme and Carlisle? And all the others?" I asked gently. He breathed in deeply, inhaling my scent.

"They'll be upset that we don't want to come back. But I care more about what you want more than anyone. So…do you want to live somewhere else, with just me as company?" he asked, pulling away from my hair to see my reaction.

I just stared at him, but I smiled widely. "You want to just live together, just to two of us?" I asked.

He nodded. "Of course I do. But I have one, no two conditions that I would like to be taken care of before we move somewhere else."

_Jasper POV_

Alice gave me a suspicious look. "And those conditions are?" she prompted.

"Marry me first, and then let me change you into a vampire." I said quickly.

I bit my lower lip, waiting patiently for her answer. I looked over at her, she was smiling.

"Yes, of course I will." She said, breathless.

I turned to stare at her. "Yes to marriage, or yes to the vampire?" I asked.

She scoffed and punched me lightly on the shoulder. "Yes to both you nimrod. Of course I'll marry you. Why wouldn't I?" she asked.

I shrugged, and became panicked when tears started streaming down her face. "W-why are you crying? Alice! I didn't mean to make you upset." I said, rolling over on top of her and kissing her tears away.

"I'm not upset Jasper! I'm crying happy tears, not sad tears. I think I've shed enough of those stupid sad tears don't you think?" she asked.

I shrugged, and nudged her legs apart. So that my hips rested cradled in hers.

She shivered as I did so.

"Are you horny again?" she asked, her voice hoarse.

I smiled sheepishly at her. "Maybe….is that okay." I asked.

She laughed a deep throaty laugh. "Jasper, with you, it's always okay." She said as she wrapped her legs around my hips.

I laughed back at her, "Good, because when it comes to you; I can't seem to get enough."


	29. Chapter 29

Ch. 29

Jasper POV

I lie on the hotel bed; Alice was still asleep next to me.

I looked over at her and my love for her swelled up until it felt as though it would make me burst.

Her pixie like face was drawn in a deep sleep, which made me feel a little bit guilty. I had worn her out with…rigorous exercise. But I couldn't seem to help myself. I had a great level of lust for Alice.

Not that she minded. She happily obliged whenever I got a craving for her. I smiled devilishly and lifted the blanket to peek at her naked body.

Then she squealed and rolled away. I laughed and brought her back over to me. Her face was deep red, and she was glaring at me.

"Why are you blushing? I just wanted a little peek that's all." I laughed.

She swatted at me. "I'm tired, no more exercise for right now. Please. We can do that later, sleep now." She pleaded.

"I wasn't going to make you do that again. You're the one who woke up accusing me of doing such." I laughed.

She sat up and threw a pillow at my face. "Yeah right! I can feel you're aroused stupid." She said playfully.

I laughed. "Sorry honey. Really."

She scoffed and held the blanket tight to her bare body. She threw me a playful glare. "I would've still been asleep. But no, you had to wake me up. I'm going to take a shower, _alone._" She said, then she was gone inside the bathroom.

I smiled. I love her so much, she's a goofball.

Then, my cell rang.

I got up and answered it. "Hello?"

"Jasper is that you?" Esme asked her voice frantic.

"Breath mom. It's me." I said.

She did, she took a deep breath, Even though we don't even need to breath. It was just a saying.

"What's up?" I asked, starting to pull my clothes together.

"Jasper, I have the right to call you. I was just worried when we found you and Alice gone. Where are you two anyways?" she asked.

"We're in a hotel out of town. Alice was taken by her rapist." I said. My voice turned to a deadly growl when I thought of the man.

Esme grew eerily silent. "Is she alright? What happened?" she asked.

"He's dead, that's what happened. The bastard got what he deserved." I hissed.

"I understand that. But is Alice alright?" she asked.

I didn't answer right at first; instead I looked over my shoulder at the bathroom door. "Yeah, she's fine. She's taking a shower right now." I said.

"Oh thank god. Now when should we expect you back?" she asked.

I flinched at the question. I don't know if I ever want to take Alice back there ever again. The memories there aren't exactly pleasant. So I don't have an answer to that question.

"Mom…I'm not sure if we're ever coming back." I said my voice thick with sadness.

She gasped. "What do you mean that you're not sure if you're ever coming back? Of course you are. You're home, and family are here." She said.

I sighed. "Mom, my first responsibility is now to Alice. She's the one who makes the decisions. I will not make her do anything that she doesn't want to do. It's her choice whether or not we come back. I'm sorry."

Without letting Esme say another thing, I shut the phone and crushed it in my hand.

_Alice POV_

I stayed in the shower as long as I could, letting the water wash away any trace of my captivity.

It felt good to be clean again, I don't have to feel that horrible man on my skin anymore.

Because he's dead.

Even with a shower, I could still feel Jasper's touch. He had touched everywhere too, so my entire body was tingling with the left over feeling from his touch.

I liked the feeling though, it was pleasant and not dirty feeling like it had been when my captor had touched me.

My hate for him ran deep, deeper than every other bad feeling I have. When he was alive, he made me afraid of living. Being with him made me want to die and move on.

Even if I had Jasper…if I couldn't be with him, I would've chosen death then living without Jasper.

Now that my captor is dead, I'm not scared to live. I want to embrace life to its fullest.

My body is full of energy right now as well, from the question that Jasper had asked me earlier.

He had asked me to marry him, and I said yes. So that's one major thing to look forward too.

But the second question still plagues me with an eerie realization…

He wants to turn me into a vampire. Spending eternally with the one someone loves…sounds like a fairy tale, but that fairy tale has a bad part…what if we fall out of love?

_That's not going to happen and you know it._ Chided a nagging voice inside my head.

I sighed, the voice was right…I think.

But there is one thing that I can throw out right now. We can't have kids, he's 'dead' and I'm infertile. Another thing, we wouldn't grow old together…we'd stay alive forever.

_So, what are the real down falls? _I asked myself.

_You could lose yourself to the hunger of the blood, and forget all about Jasper. That is one of the downfalls. Another is, you may never be yourself when you're changed, you could change completely and Jasper wouldn't love you anymore._

_Are you ready to put that up to the risk? To lose yourself forever and never return? And to lose the one person that ever truly understood you? Are you willing to lose yourself, and him? These are the key questions: Are you ready? And are you willing to lose everything?_

My breathing became labored. What if that happens…what if I lose myself and Jasper doesn't love me anymore.

_Then death is your only salvation._


	30. Chapter 30

If the rain never fell, and just stood still… would it be considered rain? When it just hung in the air?  
What if the leaves never fell? Then would autumn ever come?  
If the winters cold killing breath never blew, would the flowers live eternally?  
If I just stood still… would time pass me by still?

If my heart stopped beating, but I was still breathing, would I still be living… or would I be considered the undead?

What causes the flow of time to go only forward, and not backward too? Why can't we rewind what we have done? We could change things that we don't like right? Or maybe not…

So many questions, so little answers to any of the questions I really want answered. I wonder, and never get an answering thought, no matter how hard I think about something. Nothing comes to mind how something turns out. Is death really oblivion, or a new rebirth?

That's a mystery never to be answered, or maybe it will in the near future….

Maybe is the answer for almost ever question that I ponder about.

Never a straight answer…always 'maybe'.

-Fictionheart17  
June 17, 2010 6:40 p.m

'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

Chapter 30

_Then death is your only salvation._

My heart shuddered at the only answer that came to my mind. It's true though, I will never love another as I love Jasper. He's my only one, my soulmate.

Tears pricked in my eyes, stinging painfully as they formed and fell down my cheeks.

_I don't want to lose myself the bloodlust._ I cried inside my head.

A silent sob escaped from me. I don't ever want to lose Jasper. The thought of that was just to unbarable to even think about.

He is now apart of my entire state of exisitence. Without him, there is now me. Alice would cease to exist without Jasper present in the world.

A knock sounded from the door, breaking me out of my trance. "Yes?" I said, my voice going ruff.

"Alice? Are you okay? You sound like you're crying." Jasper said. His voice was muffled by the door, but that did not block the concern that edged his voice.

"I'm fine Jasper. I'll be out in a few minutes."

"Okay." He said.

_Jasper POV_

I leaned my forehead against the door of the bathroom. Alice was crying, I know that she is. But what about?

My conversation with Esme did not go well, though I wish it had.

I looked over at the trashcan, where my crushed cellphone was laying in. They had no way to contact me now, they don't need a reason too.

My already dead heart sank a little with the thought of never being able to see my family again, a single memory with everyone together flashed into my mind.

I would miss them, no doubt about that, but Alice is more important to me right now…no, not just right now. For the rest of eternity she will be more important to me than anything else.

Is it bad… that I'm choosing love over my family?

_Alice POV_

Instead of getting out of the shower right away, I stayed in for an extra half an hour. The water got cold way before then, but I still stayed in the shower until my tears dried up.

I dried myself off with the overly fluffy towel from the hotel bathroom, despite the fact that it barely absorbed anything even if it was really fluffy.

I pulled the towel from my face, it smelled of Jasper….

I looked around the bathroom, it was all white… plain neutral white. No color in sight, not even the towels.

I was the only splash of color in the bathroom, and I'm pretty pale too.

"Jasper…" I whispered.

The door opened in a flash, and Jasper's arms wrapped around me embracing me against his hard body.

I snuggled into him, not caring that my skin was still dripping wet.

He buried his face into my damp hair and whispered, "Are you alright?" into my hair.

I smiled at his concern, he really is the best. I stroked his hair with my left hand, and ran my right hand up and down his back.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I said gently.

With that being said…I wanted him again.

I felt Jasper stiffen as I let him find out that I was aroused.

He breathed in deeply and chuckled, "So this is how you're going to distract me? By getting turned on?"

I nodded. "I don't want to tell you what I was crying about yet. I'm in desperate need of being sated. I'll tell you later if I remember to tell you." I said.

He pulled away to meet my gaze. "Oh, don't worry. I won't forget, I'll ask you about it later when I'm done.

_Jasper POV_

I was once again in bed; with Alice asleep next to me.

She had done a good job of distracting me, but I still didn't forget that she said that she'd explain.

She stirred and snuggled more tightly against me. I moved hair out of her face, and just gazed at her beautiful pale skin.

Her eye opened and looked at me, a smile spread on her lips.

"You remembered right?" I asked.

She gave a small smile, and nodded. "Yeah, I remember that I promised. I guess that I didn't distract you good enough, did I?" she asked.

I laughed. "You actually almost made me forget, but no I wouldn't forget that. Now tell me why you cried." I said, getting right to business.

She sat up and took in a quivering voice. "I just was scared about something." She admitted.

I gave her an expectant look.

"I'm worried that if I'm changed, that you won't love me anymore."


	31. Chapter 31

Ch. 31

Alice POV

As I said those words, I regretted them at once.

Jasper looked at me, hurt. And that look made me regret them even more.

He grabbed my hand with lightning fast speed before I could bolt back to the bathroom and held it gently in his hand.

He pressed his lips to my knuckles, and gave me a gentle smile. "Alice, you don't ever have to worry about that. I will always love you no matter how you turn out. You can grow another head, and I'd still love you. That's how much I love you. Do you understand that?" he asked.

I swallowed through my tight throat and nodded. "If I hurt your feelings, I'm sorry about that Jasper. I just wanted to get that off my chest." I said hesitantly.

He smiled and then dragged me over to him, embracing me in his arms. "Alice, I love you. Soon you'll be my wife, and we'll spend an eternity together. Are you still down with the idea of spending forever with me?" he asked.

I smiled shyly and said, "Jasper, I'll never want anyone but you. You can't make me stop loving you even if you wanted me too."

He smiled. "Good. Because, I was thinking…want to go to Vegas and get married right now?" he asked.

My jaw dropped at his idea, and a giggle came out of my mouth. "You really want to marry me?" I asked.

He gave me a duh stare. "Of course I do silly girl. I already proposed to you; don't tell me you're already engaged to someone else." He said jokingly.

I laughed, "Nope, I'm free from now and the rest of my life."

He nodded. "Good, that's very good. I already cleared my schedule for you for the rest of eternity." He said.

I bit my lip and then kissed him lightly on the lips. "What about Esme and Carlisle, and the others? Don't you want them?" I asked.

_Jasper POV_

"Uh, actually…Esme called a while ago." I admitted.

She arched an eyebrow. "What? She did, what did she want?" she asked suspiciously.

"She wanted to ask us when we were coming home." I sighed.

"And you told her what?"

"That we may never come back."

She gasped. "Why in the hell did you tell her that?" she asked appalled.

I shrugged. "I don't know why I said it Alice; trust me she wasn't very happy about what I said to her. She probably is really hurt. But I didn't want you to have to go back to Forks and relive all those horrible memories." I said.

"You said those things to your mother for me?...Are you stupid or something!" she asked.

I stared at her surprised. "What do you mean?" I asked.

"Jasper, if I didn't want to relive those memories, I would've left Forks by now. I would've left a long time ago instead of staying. I have you, and other family there, why would I want to leave now?" she asked.

I shrugged "I don't have a clue, unless you get sick of me." I suggested.

She scoffed. "How would I get sick of you?"

"Hey, I can be very demanding; you just haven't gotten me in a demanding mood yet." I said, laughing when her face turned pink.

"That's what I'm going to miss most, your human expressions." I said absentmindedly. I reached out and ran a gentle hand down her cheek.

She gave me a soft gentle look that made me love her all the more. "I know you'll miss some things about me… is it worth it to lose them, and keep me around forever?" she asked.

I nodded, "Yes, you're definitely worth keeping around, if you weren't I wouldn't have asked you to let me change you."

She laughed when I tickled her, and sighed. "Jasper, we have to go back. It's the right thing to do, and you know what… I don't want to lose the family I just got. I want to have a family with me… and I don't want to tear you away from your family. It's just not right."

"Well, we can't exactly call them back; I crushed my cell after Esme called. I didn't want any more calls after that." I said, feeling guilty.

"Jasper, there's such a thing as a regular phone. We can call from here." Alice said, picking the phone off the hook showing it to me.

"Oh yeah. I forgot those things even existed. Haven't used one since I got my cell phone."

"Uh huh. Well hon, that's what I call 'phone obsession'." She laughed.

Then she dialed the number for home and handed me the phone.


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32

Jasper POV

I held the phone for a few minutes, my mind blank of any idea of what to say…especially after I said such things to her in our last conversation.

It rang loud enough I could hear it without even putting my ear up to the receiver, but then she picked up.

"Hello?" asked Esme's voice, uncertain and thick with sadness.

Alice crossed her arms over her chest and gave me a glare, telling me silently to put the phone to my ear.

'I don't know what to say.' I mouthed angrily.

Alice rolled her eyes and snatched the phone away from me and turned her back toward me as she up it up to her ear.

"Esme? It that you?" she asked into the phone.

I heard a squeal of happiness, then a low mumbling. Tsk, so much for stupid super hearing...stupid crappy vampire powers.

Alice started to speak into the phone, saying things like she was alright, and that I was sorry, blah, blah, blah. Boring girl talk if you ask me, but still I listened, trying to catch what Esme was saying. I caught nothing, zip, zilch, nada.

"Alright Esme, thanks. I love you too. Alright, I'll see you tomorrow first thing in Vegas than. Bye." Then Alice hung up the phone up on the hook.

Alice turned to stare at me, her eyes more sharp than the points of daggers. "Buster, if I didn't love you, I would rip your heart out from where you stand right now. Never say that to Esme ever again, she was very upset with you, because you said a thing like that to her. What were you thinking, or were you even thinking at all? Is that the question I should be asking?" she asked her voice sounding venomous.

I looked down at the floor, ashamed of what I said. "I'm sorry honey." Was all I could say to her, I couldn't find anything else to say.

I heard her walking toward me and I felt her arms come around my waist, her head rest on my chest.

"It's alright; I can't stay mad at you for long anyways. I love you too much to be angry at you more than... five seconds. How's that?" she laughed, looking up at me with a big smile that simply melted my heart.

I put my arms around her waist, dragging her even closer to me. When I took a breath, I groaned when burning started like a wild fire down my throat.

"Shit." I hissed.

Alice cocked her head to the side, looking entirely too adorable when she did.

A gave her a rueful look, one of despair. "I need to go hunting, my thirst is going to become out of control soon if I don't do something about it." I said quietly.

Alice smiled. "Oh honey, don't worry. That's fine, do what you have to do. I can't lose you to this thirst of yours, besides, you should think of yourself before me. Your wellbeing matters a lot more to me than my own life. Now go get yourself something to eat… or drink."

I laughed and hugged her tightly. "You're the best, you know that?"

She giggled lightly and smiled warmly. "I try. Now go, or I won't stay awake for you." She said.

I nodded, placed a kiss on her cheek, than left.

Alice POV

I sighed in exhaustion after Jasper left. My body ached all over and I felt as though I had been hit by a truck.

"Exhausting isn't it? Trying to keep up with a vampire's energy when you're nothing but a mere human" laughed an airy voice.

I stiffened and jerked around I gasped as a saw a boy leaning against the wall, the window was open.

"H-how did you get in here?" I asked, my voice going shaky.

He laughed loudly, no real humor in his laugh. "It wasn't that hard. The window was unlocked. You're vampire shouldn't had been in such a hurry to get back to you." He said.

I backed up slowly. "And why is that?" I asked.

The boy smiled, revealing shiny white teeth. "Because he's already out of hearing distance. No matter how loudly you scream, he won't hear you. He left you unprotected, you're just ripe for the picking too." He said.

He came at me faster than I could comprehend, turning into a mere blur when he ran towards me. His hand enclosed around my throat, and the back of my head slammed back hard into the wall. I couldn't scream, my throat was crushed.

I stared in horror as red eyes focused on mine, and the last thing I saw where those blood red eyes boring into mine. The last thing I felt was his mouth on my throat and biting in.


	33. Chapter 33

_Chapter 33_

_Alice POV_

Everything was dim…just small specks of light in my vision. I couldn't focus on anything; they moved by too fast to be seen. Even though I knew I couldn't see, it's like the scenery didn't even _want _to be seen; how weird is that?

My eyes focused, finally. Trees, deep green in color, zipped past me in a flash of movements that were both graceful and precise all at the same time. My head felt heavy, my eyes started to drift shut, and I fell back into the darkness.

I was slammed onto the ground, and then tied up by the wrists, eyes, and feet. A thick rope was tied around my wrist and ankles, then my eyes were bound by a blindfold of some sort. My head fell to one side, from the tired feeling I was dragged into. My whole body felt like it weighs a ton, and I couldn't force it to move; it was that heavy.

I moaned weakly, trying to form words, but failed.

"Hush, you'll be fine." Said a sweet as honey voice.

I tried to shake my head, but I just slumped back against something smooth and hard… a rock?

_Jasper POV_

I walked into the hotel room that Alice and I had been staying in; I slid the card into the door, and opened it. I was holding breakfast for her, but it slid out of my grasp when I saw the shape of our hotel room.

The bed was completely flipped over, the head board broken; the chairs were all snapped apart, the sheets torn to shreds. Everything was absolutely ruined, and Alice was gone.

Oh no… WHERE IS SHE!

I forgot all about the food, stepped into the room, and slammed the door so hard that it rattled on its hinges. Cracks appeared in the wall from the force I used against the door. My anger worked up almost as once. I roared and punched my fist straight through the wall.

Alice's scent was all around the room, the scent and sight of her blood were on the bed sheets. But there was another scent in the room, someone's that I didn't recognize. It was definitely _not_ human, not in any way. The person that had taken her had been one of my kind.

I inhaled deeply, trying to pick up the scent, to follow it. I caught it, and walked the direction of the scent. I became pulled to the puddle of dried blood that stained the torn sheets; the scent was mixed with the scent of Alice's blood.

I picked up a piece of blood sodden sheets and placed it to my nose. The scent of Alice's blood was strongest, but there was an underlying scent barely there under the intoxicating one of her blood. I gritted my teeth in anger when I smelled the sour stench of Alice's fear.

Whoever this person was, they better pray that I never find them when I find Alice, or I will kill them.

_Alice POV_

I woke up with a scream of pain. My whole body burned alive, as if it were melting, my throat was so dry that if felt like it was cracking. My eyes opened to see nothing but red, the color of blood. That's what I desire; I want the crimson liquid to run down my throat, to quench my thirst.

Strong as steel hands grasps mine, and wrenches them upward, restricting my movement. Lips press to mine, a tongue slides through my lips. I try to force it out of my mouth, but then I begin to suck on it like a baby eating from its mother. Blood ran thick of that tongue, and into my mouth. It quenched my parched throat, easing the pain I was feeling.

I was no longer burning alive for blood, I was coming alive with a new prospective…

To feed… and to kill until my body is sated, until I _truly_ come alive.

~~AN~~

_Sorry that the chapter is so short, I just felt like this was a good way to end this chapter. I also apologize that I haven't updated anything in a while, I also hate to say this again, but my life was just in a bad spot again. I just sort of lost my inspiration for writing for a while. I just recently started pouring myself back into my writing. When I'm upset, I just get an emotional flood, and sometimes I can write, and sometimes it just get's blocked. I've only just realized how much writing really means to me, especially on here, I get to hear all of your guys' kind words; I just really needed some encouragement from someone, thanks to you guys who've read this story this far, I _really_ appreciate the support. I don't really get it that much, but thanks to those who are giving it to me. I love you guys a lot, and I all hope you'll still stick with me, no matter how much of a dumb ass I'm being right now. I'm going to continue writing fanfics, and I hope you guys will keep on reading them, because it sure means a lot to me. And don't worry, I'll update this fanfic again as soon as I can, and next time, I'll make the chapter longer._

_Love you guys lots,_

_ Fictionheart17_


	34. Chapter 34

_Chapter 35_

_Alice POV_

I roared to life, my whole body burned alive with the need to kill, and take the life of a living thing. I needed the blood running through a creature's veins, my body craves the red, life sustaining liquid that pumps through them.

I am mindless with need for it; though I now believe I am mindless altogether.

I scratch out, trying to fight against the arms that bind me down to the ground. My throat burns as though hot coals are being shoved down my throat.

"Are you going to feed her anytime soon?"

"Patience, this is an experiment; we need to see what will happen."

Lips seal over my mouth, a tongue shoves into my mouth, and blood slips down my throat. I suck madly at the source of the life giving liquid. My thirst is quenched only a smidge, not nearly all the way sated.

He pulls his mouth away from mine, I scream out in pain as the full blast of the heat flared back up in my throat.

"What are you trying to do exactly?"

A laugh sounded out, "I'm only torturing her. I'm seeing that if I make her mindless with bloodlust, will she do as I say? I'm trying to create a controllable newborn. I want to use her to kill a certain someone."

"Who exactly?"

"Why, Jasper Hale of course. He needs to die, in order for me to get my revenge."

"I hope you know what you're doing."

Another laugh, "Why of course I do. And if this does happen to fail, then we'll simply try a different option."

"What are you going to do with her if she fails?"

"Kill her."

"What of her if she actually succeeds?"

"Why, kill her of course. She's only needed for one task, nothing more, and nothing less."

The other laughed. "You are a sick twisted bastard, you know that?"

Another laugh from the other, "Why thank you, I try."

I wonder something… who is this Jasper Hale?...I don't know, or remember….

_Jasper POV_

_The dark ocean water before me brewed in angry swirls and waves as it reared up to crash onto the shore in a soft 'shush' sound. The wind ruffled my hair as it came from across the ocean, to land. The shadowed, gray landscape of an Alaskan shoreline stretched behind me. The town of Sitka was a couple of miles away from me, but I feel that if I were to go into the town right now; there would be many unfortunate deaths._

"_Are you looking for someone?" _

_I looked over my shoulder to find an old man standing a few feet behind me._

"_What makes you think that?" I asked coolly, struggling to control my anger._

_The old man shrugged. "You just have an angry air about you. My son used to come out here when he was younger, when he was angry, he'd stand in that same spot and boil in his anger. He also used this place to think about things, to clear his mind. Whenever he tried to find someone, he'd always end up here too, to think about things." He said._

_I nodded. "I doubt that I'd have such luck."_

_I had tracked Alice's and some unknown scent all the way here; it ended at the docks near the town. _

"_They were here a while ago. You missed them by a day or two."_

_I looked back at him, startled. "What?"_

_He gave me a smug smile. "Your woman, she was taken aboard a boat that was at the dock a couple of days ago. She was taken by two people, and they took off after they got here. You're looking for her, right?" he asked._

"_How do you—" _

"_That's not important, what the important thing is, she's been taken to Italy. Go now, maybe you could catch up. I only put a half tank of gas in the boat." He said, smiling evilly._

"_Thank you? Who are you?"_

_I blinked, and then he was gone. I looked both ways, searching for him, but he was gone…strange…_

_I looked out at sea, then growled deep in my chest. I ran into the water, and then dived down into its dark depths. _

_Don't worry Alice, I'm coming to get you; I will find you, and I will kill the people who took you. That's a promise._

_-AN-_

_Sorry this chappy is so short. I found a good ending point, so I took it. Hope you guys R+R, TTFN!_

_-fictionheart17_


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35

Jasper POV

I slapped the money onto the counter at the airport, in some town in Alaska. I've lost track of where I've gone, I no longer have a sense of direction to guide myself with.

I have a single task on mind, and nothing else is going to breach my mind until I complete this certain task.

To get Alice back from whoever took her from me.

If only I hadn't been so foolish as to leave her alone, and unprotected.

I'm so stupid.

A memory flashed through my mind, the memory of Alice's beautiful face as she smiled at me. I loved her smile; it made me feel like I still had a beating heart in my chest... or at least somewhere in this long dead chest.

I am an old vampire, and never have I felt this longing for anyone... never in all my years would I believe myself in love with a human...

The woman sitting at the counter jumped with a slight fright coming over her features. But then she did all the other things that human females like to do, they see how unearthly I look; and decide that I'm beautiful or something like that.

She smoothed her face over with a sly smile, and then placed her tongue between her front teeth as she smiled at me like a predator looking for its next meal.

"Well, hello there. Is there something I can help you with?" she asked, trying to make her voice to sound all sultry,

I felt my lip starting to quiver with disgust, such fickle creatures these things are; nothing like my Alice.

"Give me a ticket that will get me the closest to Italy, its urgent; so please hurry." I said. My words were clipped and to the point. I didn't have time to waste on this human female.

My words didn't discourage her; she fluttered her mascara laden eyelashes at me; as if they would get my heart beating again or something.

"Can you just give me the damn tickets?" I demanded.

I slammed my fist on the counter in front of me; but I didn't use my full strength. I would've broken the thing apart.

She jumped from my anger, and then started to babble hurriedly as she scurried around to gather all the proper information for me to buy my tickets.

And then finally, she actually gave me the damn tickets.

I nodded to her slightly, but didn't offer her a smile. "Thank you very much, miss. I'm sorry that I had to be rude, but I don't have time for your flirting right now."

Because my heart belongs to another...

The woman seemed to not understand, because her gaze at me became something that was filled with anger, and arrogance. I don't care, and I never will.

She placed the ticket on the counter with a snide placement of her hand, she sneered at me angrily; then she said with so much fake sweetment, it made me sick; "Have a safe trip sir."

I wish I could've gutted her.

I took the ticket, and went on my way.

Stupid fucking humans.

_Alice POV_

The hunger I was feeling constantly…was gone. I felt no more burning for days after just that little of blood my creator gives to me.

I hear his plan, he wishes to control me; and then he wants to destroy me.

What have I done to deserve death so quickly?

I tapped my nails angrily against the floor of my dirty cell. My creator keeps me locked away from everyone and everything; my grand creator, my creator's creator, doesn't know that I exist.

My creator's friend, and accomplice, always talks of the consequences if they were to ever be found out.

They call themselves the Volturi, a league of self appointed vampire royalty; or that's at least what I can deduct from the information that my creator and his friend are always discussing.

They call me a liability several times whenever they meet, and they keep devising new plans in which to get rid of me.

They wish to use me, and then kill me. I don't want that to happen.

I want to know where I'm from.

And who is Jasper Hale?

And why does my creator want me to destroy him? Why not do it on his own?

So many fucking questions, and there's no answers for me to grasp at; none at all.

I fucking hate being in this goddamn cell, I deserve to be free… I desire freedom more than anything else in life, for now that is.

I want to be able to see the world; I feel like I was deprived for my entire life, that I've never seen the true colors of the world with my very own eyes. I want to do that, I want to see the entire world; not the four dirty walls of some fucking cell, in the middle of fucking nowhere.

I hissed angrily, I want out!

Everything was silent, my creator and the other are gone; they have gone back to their leaders.

I scowled, why didn't I try ever breaking out of here before?

I have incredible strength, speed, and every other sense if fucking heightened all the way into insane.

I can just break down the door.

Duh!

Why didn't I think of that before?

I stood up, and flexed my toes on the concrete floor below me. I braced myself, and then ran at the door; full speed.

It buckled under the force of my blow right when I hit it. The thing broke down like a delicate flower in a harsh wind.

I laughed, "Stupid bastards, you thought you could keep me in here? Think again! I'm free!"

I laughed, for real this time, and smiled happily. I was free! I can leave, and never come back!

"Alice?"

_AN_

_I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I know it's not that great, my writing sucks; but I'm not complaining. Thanks for reading, and I'm going to update soon. Later peeps! I love you guys!_

_~Fictionheart17_


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36

Alice POV

Someone called my name, I turned to look…all time seemed to stop.

I stared into a pair of liquid golden eyes that reminded me of a foreign warmth that I once contained in my human body—but those memories are now just far off day dreams I had when I found myself unable to do much of anything.

The male called my name again, "Alice?" he stepped towards me, I inhaled—smelling a million different things, even blood, but my thirst waded back at the sight of the male that looked too much like a lion to be a part of my kind, or human.

_Memories flashed in my mind, me, and him, bodies intertwined as we made ferocious yet temperate love to each other. We took each other, and gave to each other. _

I was startled by the memories that seemed like nothing but dreams to me. I don't remember feeling these strange sensations before, could they be from before I had become what I now was?

My dead heart hurt, and I wished it would start beating, and pumping the blood that had dried up not long ago.

I was new to this, but at the same time, I had been exposed to his love and his touch before.

I bit my lip, pain floating up into my chest—this was all coming over me like a down pour over the earth.

Because not only did I remember the feelings of love this male gave me…memories that were badly faded and seemingly torn spread over my mind like a thick fog. I was in pain, foreign invasions taking into my body—pain my only outlet; my screams and cries were let loose, but were always unheard.

My breathing picked up, my thirst made me forget all those memories that were causing my madness, and I wanted to _eat….!_

I tore off running; human prey is to be devoured!

Jasper POV

I got one good look at Alice; she was breathtakingly beautiful, even with the strange look of madness taking over her. I called her name a second time, and then she was gone with the wind—running away from the memories that she had forced into dormant sleep, and all she wanted to do was escape.

She tore off down the dark street, and I found myself fading into the darkness right after her inky black blur of a shadow.


	37. Chapter 37

Chapter 37

Alice POV

The madness is taking over me...this isn't who I am!

I was trapped in the bleak black of my mind; it was a terrifying prison full of nothingness.

I had never been afraid of the darkness, I was always afraid of the typical things—spiders, snakes, icky bugs. But since I was taken, I had always feared the darkness—not being able to see anything, never to see the predator coming at me.

Since I was taken from my family, and trapped in the dark heart of the woods, I had become terrified of the darkness. I would never know if he was there, if he was coming or not.

He would grab me in the dark, and violate my body with that disgusting thing he called a body.

I stared into the bleakness, my hands gripping my scalp; I was tempted to tear my hair out of my scalp.

I screamed, my throat being torn by the reverberating sound. Yet there was no sound to be heard, I was in nothingness.

I no longer existed…

What happened to my light?

Where did he go in my time of need?

Jasper POV

I chased Alice with all my might, her slight figure nothing but a blur against the background as she zipped on by everything, searching for her human meal.

I could sense her madness; it was swarming into me like a wave of water out of the ocean. I didn't care who died right now, I just wanted my Alice back.

I jumped off everything in my path, until I finally caught up to Alice, and I launched myself at her; we went down crashing as my arms encircled her waist and dragged her off her blazing trail.


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38

Alice POV

I thrashed against the strong hold on my waist, I hissed at the angelic face of the man holding me like a lost lover. My newly dead heart seemed to hurt from the contact, and from the sight of this man's face.

I stopped my hissing at once, my burning hunger gone, my eyesight lightened by multiple degrees. I found myself flipping the strange man over, to where I was sitting on top of him. I simply stared down at him, awestruck—yet I couldn't remember where I had seen him before.

I leaned down, framing his face. He stared up at me, raw pain striking through his eyes like a hot branding iron. I felt his pain, it ravished painfully through my body the longer I stared into his eyes.

I didn't know his face or name, yet at the same time I did. My memories of him were bleak and gone, yet still there. Though I couldn't remember him from my past, my body was familiar with his. I found myself kissing him with a fever like passion that struck through me as quick as lightening.

He kissed me back without hesitation, he tried to speak to me across our meeting lips, but our passion was too much to try and speak through. He gave up trying to speak to me, and just kissed me back with as much hunger just seconds ago. He flipped me over and pressed me into the ground.

I wanted to have skin to skin contact, the clothes are too binding.

I must have growled this, because he had me in his arms quickly, and tore off into lush greenery that was under the cover of nightfall. He tore away my clothes, just as I did his, our lips, and our bodies met in a hot wave.

My memories didn't return, but he made my body remember in the long hours of the cool, yet serene night.

Jasper POV

I was feral with need for my mate, all rational thought that I had was now gone as our bodies met after so long. Our animalistic, primal like need made us go hard and fast, then made us go round, after round, after round of raw need.

We never got tired, one of the perks of being a vampire.

We memorized each other till the dawn settled on the horizon.


End file.
